Heroica RPG - Quest#66: WANTED! Steerpike the Poisoner

[Flipz]

"And to be fair, you can't fault him or any of the Watch for distrusting us. I mean, three of the past four missions they've sent us on have ended in failure--and on two of them, if rumor is to be believed, the Heroes sold out to the Wolfgang. Not exactly inspiring stuff." And as to that third failure... Arthur didn't know much about the mysterious mission to Strivvi, but between the irritatingly incomplete Quest record, the record of those Heroes' previous Quest for the Watch, and what little talk there was about the subject around the Barracks, he surmised that it had ended in disaster...and apparently, it was once again the fault of the Heroes, though no one would say why. He hadn't been able to glean more than that, but if they had followed the previous pattern...

"Why do you think the other Heroes keep siding with the Wolfgang? D'you think they have some sort of...power...on their side? Or are our brethren really that weak-willed? Or unprincipled?"

Edited April 29, 2013 by Flipz

[Sandy]

"Chef Yasmar, allow me to explain, I'm assigned here with my assistant to check that everything is in order, you know the importance of this evening , we'll be quiet"

"megablocking finally, a straight answer! Just stay the hell away from my way and maybe we can fit in the same room."

"Thanks, Arnulf." Kiray inches closer to the rogue. Kiray peers into the pots and pans, away (if possible) from the chef's long reach.

There's food boiling and frying in the pots and pans, but the Master Chef isn't pleased with Kiray poking around his cooking.

"What the megabluck are you doing, princess? Do not touch anything, capiche?"

Grimwald spoke calmly to the, uh... thing standing before them. "Now now, Chef Yasmar, there's no need for profanity. You wouldn't want us to have to tarnish your good name in our kingdom, now would you?"

"Who the megabluck are you to give me lectures, midget?! Do not cross with me in my kitchen! I could make a stew out of you if I wouldn't be so damn busy."

The hulking chef is fuming. The party isn't doing great trying to keep the situation calm...

"Sir, I am Nyx and I am honoured to meet you. I heard you mention Mercution, and I would love to know more about the great and honourable heritage of the Moone Elves and the sunken Mercution, if you would be so kind as to indulge me."

The maitre d' raises an eyebow as Nyx approached the guests, but does not interfere.

"Ah, I'm enchanted to meet such an educated young lady! Ambassador Luneth, at your service. Alas, the story of Mercution is a sad one. The Free Islands and Moone are the only pieces of land left from the once great kingdom. We Moon Elves were a proud people, and where pride resides, there demons get a foothold. The Cult of Azazot swept across the realm, possessing the minds of the high and mighty, down to the last king of Mercution. A great war erupted between the kingdoms of the Moon and the Sun - Mercution and Ennon. Ultimately the Ennonian Wizard Priests saw no other option than to sink their adversaries under the waves of the Crystalline Sea. But this was all a millennia ago... There is only a handful of us Moon Elves left, clinging to the memory of our lost splendour. Ah, but I must apologize for burdening you with such a sad story on this night of celebration, Miss Nyx. I hope you can forgive an old fool such as me?"

"Ah, Lady Diana, you're a vision! I dare say your elegance even exceeds that of fair Drandora! Speaking of which, how is she this time of year? May I assist you in finding your seat?"

The Drandoran representative tuts.

"In the Drandoran court, servants are seen but not heard. But what would you ruffians know about court etiquette..."

"Hello there chap! Care to join me for a drink? I'm afraid I arrived a little bit early, I've never been good at time. The name is Lord Lawrence Boomingham. My kingdom lies in the High Kingdoms. Where do you hail from? What's your drink of choice?"

"Ah, a kindred spirit! Please, show me to the drinks, Lord Boomigham - I'm thirsty as a mermaid on dry land! Any drink will do, I'm not picky." One of the waiters rushes to give a goblet of wine to the werelion, but much to Boomingham's chagrin, he is left without. "Aye, I was taken as a slave from my homeland of Terra Chima as a wee cub, but I worked my way to freedom and joined the Mistarian Trading Company. And look at me now, Lord and Commander of the finest ship to ever grace the port of Miranda - The Sealion. You must come to the harbour tomorrow, so I can give you a tour, old chap. But where's your goblet? Hoy, waiter! Bring the good lord here something to drink!"

Reluctantly the waiter gives Boomingham a drink as well. A pleased grin spreads to the old knight's face.

Outside, more influential guests arrive.

"Admiral Bonaparte, Lady Bonaparte, welcome! I am sorry to hear about your loss."

"..."

"Yes, we will all miss Reno dearly. How we wish he would be here to enjoy this wonderful night with us."

"Indeed. I hope you have a splendid evening, nevertheless."

The Bonaparte couple have barely made it into the Theater when another family arrives.

"Mr. Wigglepike, Captain Cousland. I trust tonight's arrangements have gone smoothly?"

"Certainly, Mr. Hinckwell. You and your family have absolutely nothing to worry about, me and my men are here to ensure that."

The older son of the Hinckwell family smirks.

"I heard you employed Heroica to help you out. I hope you aren't losing your grip, captain?"

"Lorcan!"

"It was just a precaution,Mr. Hinckwell. You can rest assured that every measure has been taken to make this night a success."

"I will hold you to that promise, captain. Let us enter, my nearest and dearest."

"Yes, I can hardly wait to finally hear Barbariccia singing! I have heard so much about her!"

"You shan't be disappointed, Mrs. Hinckwell. Have a great night!"

Following on the Hinckwells' footsteps are the representatives of the faculty of the Academy of Enlightenment, lead by Provost Lector himself.

"Welcome, Provost and deans! How are things at the cradle of civilization that is your institution?"

"Just magnificent, as always! Only yesterday some of our students made a breakthrough in the field of etherology. Just you see, my friend, soon ethereal manipulation will not be the sole right of mages!"

"But hasn't Vincent Legonardo already..."

If the provost's gaze could kill, the gnomish dean would have dropped dead at that instant.

"I told you not to mention that name in my company again, Dean Bumblebore!"

"Come on now, gentlemen. Let us leave academic disputes behind for this one night and celebrate."

"Yes, let us not burden you with topics you understand nothing about, Dean Morrible."

"Why you little...!!!"

Captain Patricia steps between the quarrelling educators.

"Stop behaving like the kids you teach and move along now."

"Yes, ma'am..."

Mr. Wigglepike lets out a sigh of relief as the faculty walks in through the doors. The stream of guests subsided for the moment.

[Shoker86]

"Master Yasmar, excuse this poor peasant, he'll be punished for his profanity. We're going on our buisness, I'm sorry for the inconviniance." Arnulf turned to the Grimwald and whispered to "You fool, if you dont have anything usefull to say, don't say it." Arnulf is waiting for response and then goes to check drinks very carefully when noone is looking.

Edited April 29, 2013 by Shoker86

[Sandy]

"Master Yasmar, excuse this poor peasant, he'll be punished for his profanity. We're going on our buisness, I'm sorry for the inconviniance."

"Do you have a problem with my cooking, hovering around like flies on a turd of shit? Is my cooking not good enough for your fancy-pants lord and ladies? I have you know that I have fed kings and emperors on every corner of the world, and they all megablocking loved my food! Don't you believe me, damnit?"

[Shoker86]

"We beleive you Chef, I must say that i haven't seen better wines in my whole life, and i have seen many. I'm absolutly pleased with your work. Nothing personaly really, just doing our job. If it bothers you, I'm the man to talk, we could reach an agreement. If you don't mind i would like to talk with your staff. I'll be brief"

Edited April 29, 2013 by Shoker86

[Professor Flitwick]

The Drandoran representative tuts.

"In the Drandoran court, servants are seen but not heard. But what would you ruffians know about court etiquette..."

Eyebrows arched, Thothwick stood aside to let the ambassador find her own seat.

"[Hmpf. Pompous megablocks.]"

Turning back to the door, Thothwick listened hard for the next guests. Bowing hard upon their enterance, Thothwick greeted the Hinckwells.

"Ah, Mr. and Mrs. Hinckwell! I've yet to be graced with the pleasure of serving your illustrious family, though the tales this humble Metasimian has heard were certainly not lies! Mrs. Hinckwell, you are every bit as beautiful as I have heard you described. I see the luck of you ancestors must surely grace you to this day, Mr. Hinckwell, to have such a glamorous partner. And young Masters Hinckwell too! I see you've both inherited your mothers looks, but are you also blessed with your fathers business acumen? You'll both make two very lucky women very happy. Maybe you might encounter your brides-to-be tonight! I didn't think it would be possible to improve upon the perfection that this night will surely be, but that may just top it! Please, allow me to escort you to your table."

[Sandy]

"We beleive you Chef, I must say that i haven't seen better wines in my whole life, and i have seen many. I'm absolutly pleased with your work. Nothing personaly really, just doing our job. If it bothers you, I'm the man to talk, we could reach an agreement. If you don't mind i would like to talk with your staff. I'll be brief"

"These three have gone through a living hell working under me, and they've stuck around where countless others have ran home bawling their sorry eyes out. I tolerate only the best of the best among my staff. One megabluck-up, and you're done. But go ahead, just as long as you don't get in the way. They have nothing to hide from you."

The other chefs glance at Yasmar, surprised of his sudden leniency.

"Ah, Mr. and Mrs. Hinckwell! I've yet to be graced with the pleasure of serving your illustrious family, though the tales this humble Metasimian has heard were certainly not lies! Mrs. Hinckwell, you are every bit as beautiful as I have heard you described. I see the luck of you ancestors must surely grace you to this day, Mr. Hinckwell, to have such a glamorous partner. And young Masters Hinckwell too! I see you've both inherited your mothers looks, but are you also blessed with your fathers business acumen? You'll both make two very lucky women very happy. Maybe you might encounter your brides-to-be tonight! I didn't think it would be possible to improve upon the perfection that this night will surely be, but that may just top it! Please, allow me to escort you to your table."

Thothwick sees the youngest Hinckwell blush, but Laureline Hinckwell beams.

"Why, thank you! As a matter of fact, my husband has a big announcement to make tonight. Oh, how I look forward to that..."

"Mother..."

"Shush, you! And Lorcan-dear, remember what I said about Barbariccia. If her looks please you, take the pendant to her dressing room. It is a crying shame for you to remain unwed at your age."

"Mother, please!"

"Haha, watch out, my son. You shouldn't fall for songstresses, they bring nothing but trouble. Trust me, I should know."

Heinrich Hinckwell gives his groaning wife a kiss on the cheek.

[Shoker86]

Arnulf, after given permission, aproached the first chef "My name is Arnulf Bishop, nice to meet you, I'll be brief, I have few questions, and please do not feel uncomfortable, I'm not interogator, just checking stuff, it's in my line of buisness. How are preparations going? Did you have any problems during the day, anything "

[Flipz]

Arthur busies himself by trying to identify as many people, animals, or other beings passing by the East end of the alley. He also checks his Magic Compass for Steerpike's location again.

[Shoker86]

Arnulf whispered to Kiray "Watch their facial expressions, their body movement, you could sense lies that way, we have to be carefull, I can't ask too many questions so watch carefully"

[Zepher]

Boomingham raises his glass to the werelion. "Sounds like a true story of success. I am always extremely impressed by those who rise from nothing and establish themselves. You are most certainly more deserving of your post than I and the other Kings." Boomingham takes a sip of his wine, and then slaps his forehead. "What am I thinking?! Captain, my people have a tradition, and if you'd be so kind to indulge me, I'd be ever so thankful. It is custom, as a sign of friendship and hospitality, for friends to take the first sip of each other's drinks. Would you mind terribly if we swapped glasses very quickly? I've already muddled mine up, my wife tells me my brain has been going for years, but it would still be symbolically appropriate." If the Captain consents to honoring Boomingham's tradition, they will switch glasses and Boomingham will drink Mumbassa's drink before him. "I will of course visit you down at the docks tomorrow."

Boomingham catches sight of another old friend. The boy Lorcan, who he had not seen for a year since they had engaged in some... shadowy dealings. Boomingham raises his hand and called over to the Hinckwell boy. "Lorcan old chap! Come join me and my new friend for a glass of wine!"

[KotZ]

"Understood," Kiray whispers back to her party leader, a man who justly should be there. She did not envy his job at all at the moment. Kiray watches the chefs as they answer for microexpressions, tells, body movement, and the like.

[Endgame]

"Why do you think the other Heroes keep siding with the Wolfgang? D'you think they have some sort of...power...on their side? Or are our brethren really that weak-willed? Or unprincipled?"

"Not everyone is infatuated with the houses. I have no qualms with most of the houses - even considered siding with the Ziegfireds - but not everyone likes them."

[Flipz]

"I can't stand the Houses. But it's better than anarchy...and I can't see how the Wolfgang are any better. What do they even stand for, anyway? Aside from gang violence and nonspecific political dissent, that is."

[Pandora]

The maitre d' raises an eyebow as Nyx approached the guests, but does not interfere.

"Ah, I'm enchanted to meet such an educated young lady! Ambassador Luneth, at your service. Alas, the story of Mercution is a sad one. The Free Islands and Moone are the only pieces of land left from the once great kingdom. We Moon Elves were a proud people, and where pride resides, there demons get a foothold. The Cult of Azazot swept across the realm, possessing the minds of the high and mighty, down to the last king of Mercution. A great war erupted between the kingdoms of the Moon and the Sun - Mercution and Ennon. Ultimately the Ennonian Wizard Priests saw no other option than to sink their adversaries under the waves of the Crystalline Sea. But this was all a millennia ago... There is only a handful of us Moon Elves left, clinging to the memory of our lost splendour. Ah, but I must apologize for burdening you with such a sad story on this night of celebration, Miss Nyx. I hope you can forgive an old fool such as me?"

Nyx scans the room and considers that the Hinckwells and Bonapartes are probably who they said they were, and that the Faculty of the Academy probably wouldn't want to talk to a Mage such as her, although they may know something about Steerpike's origins. The Ambassador was telling an interesting story, but had anyone here met him before? Was he who he said he was?

"Sir, I must protest that no forgiveness is required for delighting me with tales of your history and heritage, but I am sorry that it is a sad story. I know little at all of the Cult of Azazot; what were their intentions? What is it that they hoped to achieve, if you don't mind me asking?"

[LordoftheNoobs]

Grimwald facepalms. Hard. His golden tongue had obviously gone rusty... If it wasn't for Arnulf, he'd be hot water..... literally.

"I'm sorry, laddy" he whispers to Arnulf, "I'll keep me mouth shut from now on, Gnome's honour!"

Grimwald briefly half-smiles nervously at the mountainous Chef, then scuttles off and does the same as Kiray.

[Shoker86]

Grimwald facepalms. Hard. His golden tongue had obviously gone rusty... If it wasn't for Arnulf, he'd be hot water..... literally.

"I'm sorry, laddy" he whispers to Arnulf, "I'll keep me mouth shut from now on, Gnome's honour!"

Grimwald briefly half-smiles nervously at the mountainous Chef, then scuttles off and does the same as Kiray.

"This asigment is nerve wrecking, I know" Arnulf whispered back, his nerves were also tensed "Nothing personal lad, but you are under my resposibility, if we fail it would be my fault, don't want to see any of you hurt, so concentrate, patience, we'll catch them"

[KotZ]

"Patience is easy," Kiray interjected. "Tolerance, not so much. It's hard to be tolerant fo a chef who won't let you do his job. Though, in his defense, nobody must have told him what is going on."

[Shoker86]

"Patience is easy," Kiray interjected. "Tolerance, not so much. It's hard to be tolerant fo a chef who won't let you do his job. Though, in his defense, nobody must have told him what is going on."

"I know, i would make him sing, if the quest wasn't so impotant" Arnulf replied "I'm more used to interogation than diplomacy. Easy for some folks, I'm hot blooded most of the time "

[LordoftheNoobs]

"Aye, I'm sure that's right", he whispered to the others, "But best not dwell on that now. I'm sure that he's wondering what we're doing all hushed like this... Anyway, what do you think I should do? Talk to one of the assistant chefs and try to get some useful information?"

Edited April 30, 2013 by LordoftheNoobs

[Sandy]

Arnulf, after given permission, aproached the first chef "My name is Arnulf Bishop, nice to meet you, I'll be brief, I have few questions, and please do not feel uncomfortable, I'm not interogator, just checking stuff, it's in my line of buisness. How are preparations going? Did you have any problems during the day, anything "

The assistant chef mutters something about things going smoothly until the three of them arrived. It seems that Yasmar's underlings are thoroughly dedicated to him.

"Understood," Kiray whispers back to her party leader, a man who justly should be there. She did not envy his job at all at the moment. Kiray watches the chefs as they answer for microexpressions, tells, body movement, and the like.

Kiray cannot decipher anything else than that the chefs are incredibly busy, to the point of sweating.

Arthur busies himself by trying to identify as many people, animals, or other beings passing by the East end of the alley. He also checks his Magic Compass for Steerpike's location again.

Arthur sees guests arriving to the Ball, but they walk by so quickly he doesn't have time to identify them. The arrow still points east for Steerpike.

Boomingham raises his glass to the werelion. "Sounds like a true story of success. I am always extremely impressed by those who rise from nothing and establish themselves. You are most certainly more deserving of your post than I and the other Kings." Boomingham takes a sip of his wine, and then slaps his forehead. "What am I thinking?! Captain, my people have a tradition, and if you'd be so kind to indulge me, I'd be ever so thankful. It is custom, as a sign of friendship and hospitality, for friends to take the first sip of each other's drinks. Would you mind terribly if we swapped glasses very quickly? I've already muddled mine up, my wife tells me my brain has been going for years, but it would still be symbolically appropriate." If the Captain consents to honoring Boomingham's tradition, they will switch glasses and Boomingham will drink Mumbassa's drink before him. "I will of course visit you down at the docks tomorrow."

"What an odd tradition. But what if I have rabies?"

The werelion stares unblinking at the speechless Boomingham for a moment, then bursts into a hearty laughter and consents to Boomingham's suggestion.

Boomingham catches sight of another old friend. The boy Lorcan, who he had not seen for a year since they had engaged in some... shadowy dealings. Boomingham raises his hand and called over to the Hinckwell boy. "Lorcan old chap! Come join me and my new friend for a glass of wine!"

The Hinckwell heir hears Boomingham's call and walks to the old knight and his drinking companion.

"Well, if it isn't Lord Boomingham in all his glory. It's been a long time, indeed. Just blurt it out, who are you really working for this time around? I know Captain Patricia hired you, but with you Heroica folk, one can never be sure. And Captain Mumbasa! How fares the Sealion?"

"She's better than ever, Mr. Hinckwell! Right now she's anchored in the harbour, making your trading cogs look like rowing boats."

Lorcan lets out a forced laughter.

"Sir, I must protest that no forgiveness is required for delighting me with tales of your history and heritage, but I am sorry that it is a sad story. I know little at all of the Cult of Azazot; what were their intentions? What is it that they hoped to achieve, if you don't mind me asking?"

Luneth lets out a deep sigh.

"Must we really discuss such ominous matters, milady? It is a long story, but it suffices to say that demons have a way of easily creeping into the minds of the corrupted. And back then, the gates to Azazot were flung wide open. What do demons want but destruction and chaos? They are embodiments of everything that is wicked and foul in this world. And Azazot - Zoot, as you know him - is their lord. But please, that is all far in the past now. Zoot has lost his grip on this world, or so I hope."

More quests trickle in. An especially large entourage arrives to the front yard next, each member wearing a pointy hat.

"Grand Wizardine, good to see you out and about. You look especially healthy tonight."

"I may be old, Mr. Wigglepike, but I've still got some spark left. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, as they say."

"Hear, hear! And welcome to you too, Grand Conjurator, and uh, General Summoner, and... err, Warlock Vizier... ummm..."

"It's quite alright, Mr. Wigglepike. I swear, sometimes I forget our own titles, as well!"

"You'd forget your own head if I wasn't around to remind you, husband."

"Truer words have never been spoken! My brother, without Beth you probably would've come here pantless."

"Goldraum, have you been drinking in advance?!"

"Just a sip or two of my special magic brew, dear Mabel! Hehehe..."

"I wonder... if Wolfcub666 is here tonight...? I miss him... so..."

As the Ziegfrieds enter the Theater, another eccentric citizen of Eubric arrives. (QM Note: Thanks to Zepher for the following dialogue!)

"Come along, U'Or."

"Oh dear, sir, I really don't think you should be out in public right now! What with your recent melt down, and then Sir Hughes was tragically found dead in his house, I really don't think you should be out in public!"

"Now now. Life is for the living. Don't you remember what Mr. Holla said?"

"But still, we're relatively sure that Sir Hughes was killed. And for that-"

"That's precisely why we must go out, U'Or. Show this killer we're not afraid. Maybe lure him into the open."

"I just am afraid, sir, and also sir please don't drink too much like you did last time please sir?"

"It's all in good fun. I'm sure this time I can get that Hinckwell and Shadeux to trade pants. They are traders, after all. So serious all the time."

"I was just embarrassed by the, er, sensitive information you gave to U'Lala is what embarrassed me..."

"Life is for the living, U'Or!! If you don't try to kiss her tonight, I very well might. Now, come along, I think I see that old rascal Zelda."

"Sir Guffington, welc..."

"Yes, yes, I have arrived! The party has officially started now!"

But there were still a few quests left to arrive - those who could not go outside during daylight. The setting sun threw its last rays on the rooftiles of the Theater, and then disappeared below the horizon...

As night falls, the back alley becomes an eerie place for the three heroes keeping watch there. At first they hear only the muffled sounds of music seeping inside, but then they discern a click-clack of hooves approaching. Out of the shadows emerges a knight in full black armor riding on a sinister stallion with blood-red eyes.

What do the heroes do?

[Shoker86]

Arnulf steps away from assistents, feeling that further talking would be pointless, so now he obsereves staff movements, looking for suspicios behavior.

[Professor Flitwick]

Thothwick, bidding the Hinckwells a fair evening, moves to the Ziegfrieds.

"Grand Wizardine! How well you're looking. I see that potion worked it's wonders. I'd say it's taken ten years off your appearance, too! And Mr. and Mr. and Mrs. and Mrs. and Ms. Ziegfried, too? If I'm ever to find my untapped skill with Ether, let it be today, in the presences of such wondrous mages! If I may be so impertinent to say, may I say that I hope that Sycamore Ziefried's remains provided some closure."

[Flipz]

Arthur leans physically against the door to prevent it from opening and speaks quietly to his companions. "One of you, watch the other direction, stay out of combat if it comes to that. Just in case."

He then speaks to the dark figure. "Hail, sir, what brings you this way? May we offer assistance?"

[Sandy]

"Grand Wizardine! How well you're looking. I see that potion worked it's wonders. I'd say it's taken ten years off your appearance, too! And Mr. and Mr. and Mrs. and Mrs. and Ms. Ziegfried, too? If I'm ever to find my untapped skill with Ether, let it be today, in the presences of such wondrous mages! If I may be so impertinent to say, may I say that I hope that Sycamore Ziefried's remains provided some closure."

"Why thank you, Thothwick! Your help to our family has been invaluable, I assure you. You and your companions did a great service to us for bringing Sycamore's remains back to us. Necromancy does not suit those who are easily corrupted, as my daughter-in-law proved. I truly hope she is at peace now, as well as Zed, my beloved son. If we ever find the accursed archdemon tormenting our family, I hope we can rely that you will be there fighting by our side, Thothwick."

"Hide and go seek... My favourite game..."