Etzel 2872 posts Posted October 26, 2008 Vig. 29a Hello! So, here is my entry for the small category of the Pillage the Village contest. Hopefully the overhang are acceptable, otherwise I've got to figure out some else When the evil pirates came to pillage the village a young lady managed to escape to an abandon watch tower. Unfortunately one of the soldiers came up with the same idea and the pirates followed him. Now there is no way to run and they can only pray that their deaths will be quick and painless :pir-skull: The tower of despair: Cruelty : The minifigs: Well, the picture aren't the best. I had some problems with the lightning but I hope it will do. Maybe there to big also, let me hear that if that's the case and I will try to fix them. Please let me hear your thought, this is actually the first MOC I've ever uploaded and posted in a forum. /Etzel Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zorro 5595 posts Posted October 26, 2008 (edited) My opinion: I like your MOC, I don't know about the overhang though, I suggest you PM Mister Phes/Slyowl/Phred/... The woodworks of your tower look really great! Possible improvements: 1) A shak made out of stone on top of a wooden towerframe looks a bit "unlogical", but since it is a MOC, it is only a minor issue, especcialy because the colors look so good. 2) I think the ladder would look better in brown, to represent rope. 3) Perhaps a pirate could put the tower on fire? This would force the poor woman down for sure... Non-brick related advise: 1) Your pics are a bit dark IMO. 2) Some minor spelling/grammar mistakes (or typos): eg. to an abandoned watch tower Great work Etzel, keep it up . Edited October 26, 2008 by zorro3999 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Buttons 469 posts Posted October 26, 2008 Everything that Zorro said plus one question: How is that thing standing up like that?! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Erdbeereis 6598 posts Posted October 26, 2008 Very good work on your entry Etzel! The tower has a great weatherbeaten look to it and the heads you've chosen for the minifigs are excellent. The amount of overhang I think is fine, but you should certainly ask a mod to be sure. The only thing I can think of to improve is: 1) The colors on the roof are a bit mis-matched. Personally, I think it would look better all red or all black. But that is a very minor point and I think you've done a great job with your entry! Good luck! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
General Armendariz 1726 posts Posted October 27, 2008 (edited) Good work on your entry! I like how the silly soldier just hid in the same place as the lady! Although there could be some improvements. And ask a staff member about that overlap. What could be improved: 1. You could put a different roof top color it looks to bright. 2. Like zorro3999 said, you can put a pirate lighting it on fire. 3. Put some blood in for all our blood thirsty people out there. Overall it's a really good entry. Edited October 27, 2008 by Genaral armendariz Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guss 2506 posts Posted October 27, 2008 that's a nic entry.. but I guess that with so many people on such a tower , it's going to fall really soon ! I love how you made the tower, it must have been really hard to make it "solid" the minifigs are nice but we only see the back of the pirate woman, she seems to be wearing an entirely white pyjama :P , maybe you can try to turn her a little more to the camera^^ as Zorro said , a pirate that light the tower can be a really nice addition to it ! anyway, I don't see any other advice to improve it^^ that's a really nice entry and I wish you the best for the contest! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Legoking 1033 posts Posted October 28, 2008 Opinion The story and how you have created your MOC is very well done. You have fit a lot of detail into such a small MOC. The rocks at the bottom are nicely created. I like how you fit black, dark gray and light gray all in the rocks to make it look even better. The wood pillars are very well made and how you made them twist is cool. The mesh net is a nice addition to have and to make it even better; you have a pirate climbing up it. On the second level, I like how you have the pirate captain aiming his gun at the Imperial Armada guard. You used good minifig expression for your MOC instead of having plain pirate faces. It is always good to have a pirate MOC with a damsel in distress. Possible Improvements 1) Instead of having the roof red, why don't you have it brown or black to fit the rest of the pieces used in your MOC? 2) Put some blood on the Imperial guard that just got shot by the pirate because you don't have any blood in your MOC at all. 3) You could have the pirate on the bottom level carrying a torch instead of a knife. 4) Give the pirate captain a rainbow parrot in his good hand and put the gun in his hook. Non-Brick Related 1) Some of the pictures you have are a little bit dark, causing not to see some of the pieces used in your MOC. You could add a lamp next to in, use more natural light or change the angle of the light you already have. 2) Instead of using a sheet, replace that with white paper. This will make you MOC stand out more. 3) Grammar mistake: "Hopefully the overhang are acceptable, otherwise I've got to figure out some else." It should be "Hopefully the overhang is acceptable. Otherwise I've got to think of something else." Overall- This is a very creative MOC and I liked how you fit so much into such a small 8x8 plate. You have done some good work. I wish you the best of luck! LegoKing My PTV Entry- Medium Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JimBee 10950 posts Posted October 29, 2008 Good entry, Etzel. What I like: The tower has a very "ruined look to it, good job on that. The rocks and woodwork are also nicely done. The addition of foliage and the climbing pirates only aid your entry. What could be improved: The cruelty part is good for the most part, but I would suggest to add some blood to the the soldier that got shot, and perhaps a body at the bottom. Also, the red roof has areas of black, so I would just make the whole thing red. Other than those things, your good to go. Good luck on the contest. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites