Story of Ava, chapter I

[Zarcania]

Story of Ava, chapter I

The winter was ending, the snow was starting to melt and flower to bloom. I didn't know that it will be the day where something really strange would happen in my life.

In this period, I make a short walk every day to reach the well next to the old ruins. This morning the air was nice and fresh, I was sure that the water would be available due to the melted ice. I was right by the way but in the end I did not bring any drop of water. Unlike every other occasion, the forest was quiet. When reaching the well, I saw someone lying next to our source of water. I ran to him because this night's temperature would be very hard to stand without a good fire. He was more fainted than dead and when I shook his shoulder to check whether he could answer me, his first words were to ask if he finally reached Mitgardia.

Of course I answered : " Yes, just in the south of winter lakes".

- At last, he said.

He was really struggling to breathe and I asked who he is and why he is there. He just had the time to tell me : "My name's Ava..." before going into darkness again.

I wanted to know a little more on him before bringing him home. Indeed, I didn't want to have any problem with a fleeing slave or a convicted offender. I looked through his stuff and just found his sword, few coins and a list of names, with dozens of names, and some of these are clearly Mitgardian names. I put everything in my backpack and dragged the man to my house to heat a little and save him.

Extract from the memories of Achille, woodman of Mitgardia

 

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That's the start of the story of Ava. I hope you liked it. I don't know yet where this can go at all but if you want your name on this list, I would be happy to put it :-) 

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Well, these are other the pictures of my first MOC that is not intended to be played with my kids ! Comments and critics are very welcomed. 

There are clearly lots to improve. First of all, I lack a lot of pieces as I am just starting lego (some pieces from my childhood, one set of lego friends of my daugther and some spare part bought here and there). Two creator box on the way should help.

I am happy of the well even if not brilliant, it is all from my mind and did not get ideas on the net. I put some ruins at the back to give some background details and I found the balance nearly OK. Ruins could have been bigger if I had more grey pieces !!!).

As major improvements, I know that the snow should be better (why do you think it happens in spring ;-) ), there is just small spot here and there and that is not good. Tree is at the correct size but it does not has the correct style to fit Mitgardia and semmes to be a little "poor".

I also lack minifig parts so this one is not really up to the story, pose was always strange but I guess lying is not really the better way to expose them.

The "stand" is horrible, I should find some other technics fitting "my inventory".

I also need to give some better level design because is seems too flat and the spot on the right is not of the good color.

In the end the quality of the picture itself must be improved, I have seen that there are some tips somewhere, and will go to have a look as soon as I have some time.

If you know some ressources that might help a begginer, please do not hesitate to link it in bulk here, I'll have a look.

[Bardan_Jusik]

I really like it, especially as a first MOC. I love the story and thought that went behind it. As for resources normally everyone knows about Bricklink but with you being a beginner you might not have heard about it. It's a great way to get specific pieces for builds like this. Still, very impressive for what little pieces you had available.

[Grover]

Welcome to the Guilds!  I love the story.  It's open-ended and intriguing.  You have a great attitude about learning, and I think you will find the members here are friendly and helpful!

As for the build, you have a lot of nice things going on here.  The border is solid.  The flowers on the vine are probably the standout element on the wall.  They look very good and your use of one flower color for the whole vine is great.  The mini is fun, although mixing the flesh head and yellow arms is a little unusual.  I like how you grouped most of the olive green grass near the well.  The well is simple, but it serves its purpose, and the upside down 2x2 plate inside it for water is great.  Being parts limited is tough, but you've done well with what you have.  As you get a few more parts, it will get easier.  One trick for keeping the MOC looking uniform is to limit yourself to 2-3 shades of one color.  For instance, if you have browns for dirt, you may use dark brown and reddish brown, but if you used medium nougat, tan, and dark tan as well, it would start to look a little chaotic.  In your case, you have green, bright green, olive green, and lime green all in the same build, which is getting to be a little much for the eye.  If you replaced the lime green with regular green you might have a little less distraction.  I like the wall and how you limited it to two shades of grey (as opposed to adding tans and other colors).

As for photography, a white or light grey background can help.  Even just a white sheet laid behind the build can help.

Very nice work!  Keep it up, and I look forward to seeing more of your builds and story!

Oh, and don't forget to post a link in the Free Builds thread!

Edited January 3, 2021 by Grover

[Zarcania]

Thanks a lot for your interesting and encouraging feedback.

6 hours ago, Grover said:

Welcome to the Guilds!  I love the story.  It's open-ended and intriguing.  You have a great attitude about learning, and I think you will find the members here are friendly and helpful!

As for the build, you have a lot of nice things going on here.  The border is solid.  The flowers on the vine are probably the standout element on the wall.  They look very good and your use of one flower color for the whole vine is great.  The mini is fun, although mixing the flesh head and yellow arms is a little unusual.  I like how you grouped most of the olive green grass near the well.  The well is simple, but it serves its purpose, and the upside down 2x2 plate inside it for water is great.  Being parts limited is tough, but you've done well with what you have.  As you get a few more parts, it will get easier.  One trick for keeping the MOC looking uniform is to limit yourself to 2-3 shades of one color.  For instance, if you have browns for dirt, you may use dark brown and reddish brown, but if you used medium nougat, tan, and dark tan as well, it would start to look a little chaotic.  In your case, you have green, bright green, olive green, and lime green all in the same build, which is getting to be a little much for the eye.  If you replaced the lime green with regular green you might have a little less distraction.  I like the wall and how you limited it to two shades of grey (as opposed to adding tans and other colors).

As for photography, a white or light grey background can help.  Even just a white sheet laid behind the build can help.

For my v2, I will try :

1- to find a new minifig head indeed :-) 

2- change shades of green

3- give a little relief on the right side

4- improve tree

5- change the well (the top)

6- take a new picture and post it here.

 

7 hours ago, Bardan_Jusik said:

As for resources normally everyone knows about Bricklink but with you being a beginner you might not have heard about it. It's a great way to get specific pieces for builds like this. Still, very impressive for what little pieces you had available.

I discovered a new world ! Thanks

[Grover]

21 minutes ago, Zarcania said:

Thanks a lot for your interesting and encouraging feedback.

You're welcome!  It's what these forums are for, in my opinion.  I always appreciated the feedback I got from others and try to pass it along.

21 minutes ago, Zarcania said:

I discovered a new world ! Thanks 

Don't forget about Lego's Bricks and Pieces service.  For parts that are in print, you can sometimes get better prices on B&P than Bricklink, especially after shipping.  If you need thousands, it's no good, but for specialty parts you only need a few of, it's great!

[Exetrius]

Welcome to the Guilds! This is solid start, both story-wise and build-wise! You've had to work with tough constraints, but you pushed through. I like the vine and the water well (great technique, there!) too. As far as improvement goes, there's not much that you yourself and Grover haven't mentioned yet, but I have two minor things. First, I think the placement of the olive green plants in front of the water well is not all that logical, if the well is used regularly, so I might have put them under the tree instead. The other thing is the snow. The white 1x3 slope bothers me, because all the rest of it is represented by 1x1 studs, and by itself it doesn't look very natural. Also, those two studs put vertically on that vine would better be placed on top of the wall, for consistency's sake. But that is nitpicking, keep up the good work! 

[Zarcania]

1 hour ago, Exetrius said:

First, I think the placement of the olive green plants in front of the water well is not all that logical, if the well is used regularly, so I might have put them under the tree instead. The other thing is the snow. The white 1x3 slope bothers me, because all the rest of it is represented by 1x1 studs, and by itself it doesn't look very natural. Also, those two studs put vertically on that vine would better be placed on top of the wall, for consistency's sake. But that is nitpicking, keep up the good work! 

Thanks for comments. Yeah you are right for the little plants, it should not be so closed to the place we use it.

I also agree with the slope :-) It will be removed in V2.

And once you told it, the two stud look definitively stupid there, haha, magical gravity.

[LordDan]

Nice moc to begin your saga!

[Zarcania]

On 1/15/2021 at 6:20 PM, LordDan said:

Nice moc to begin your saga!

Thanks ! :-)