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A bit late to the party, I know, but! Check out all the previous ones here! Oleander Priest "As the learned scholar once said, 'Hora quoangula hora lanchescumburger.' Whatever that means." The Oleander priest knows of no greater pleasure in life than scrubbing through all the buried, dusty, and musty tomes of the ancient Oleander libraries for strange books in important sounding languages. Unfortunately he's got absolutely no idea what any of it means most of the time, but he doesn't let such trivial things stop him from sharing his great wealth of knowledge gleaned from these ancient orators with everyone around! King Philip I of Oleon "I said I was not to be disturbed after hours on any business!!!" If King Augusto Fernando VIII of Eslandola has his nightcap, King Philip I of Oleon's got his teddybear, and he prizes and treasures that bear away as much as anyone could their most precious belonging. He is quite jealous of it, however, and can't stand if anyone else even so much as suspects its existence. Rumor has it that he even went the lengths of stuffing it in his crown once and putting it on his head when he was surprised at night by the admittance of Her Majesty of Corrington's ambassador. Bonus Picture: His Majesty's Royal Blacksmith "Your blade is my business!" If anything in the metal way needs fixing, His Majesty's Royal Blacksmith is the person to go to - at least, if you happen to be the King. He'll fix or mend anything for you in a jiffy, and the thing will be guaranteed never to break in the same place again! As for different places - he's not a magician, you know! His Majesty of Oleon's Coachman "Five minutes to get to the other side of Granoleon? Are you sure, sir?" His Majesty of Oleon likes going places fast - faster, in fact, than his worthy Coachman does. That sedate and calm gentleman came under the King's notice as a driver who had never yet had the smallest accident while driving his coach, so the King figured he'd be perfect - somehow the fact that he drove it at about half-a-mile per hour had not gotten into the resume. Now the Coachman is in constant terror of being dashed bodily into some streetlamp or another vehicle, and the way he has a habit of closing his eyes tight whenever he's particularly afraid, it's not too likely that his reputation for safety will last an awful lot longer. Eslandolan Footman "... ... ..." The Eslandolan Footman is the quiet type. He never makes more than the slightest sound, but is always at hand to take your hat and cloak, offer you an umbrella, move a vase of flowers, or take the top off of the dish of turkey. Every rich Eslandolan trader who has ever had him in their household will assure you that his excellent services are well worth the price! Eslandolan Housekeeper "I never buy cheap fruit- what? Two Doubloons for that apple? How about one and a half?" The Eslandolan Housekeeper is a prodigy of thriftiness and elegance combined. Everything that goes on her table would be fit food for the Queen of Corrington - but she paid as much for it as a Oleander peasant would for his dinner. And her abilities aren't restricted to the kitchen - you'd have thought everything in the house had cost a king's ransom until you find out just how much she managed to get it for! Eslandolan Elite Infantryman "No 1/20th Doubloon is ever wasted that put a bullet in my gun!" The Eslandolan Elite Infantryman is the swiftest of the swift when it comes to executing complex military tactics on land, and it's rare that his cleverness and speed don't turn a battle in his favor! And when you add his excellent swordmanship and aim to that, he's just the soldier you want fighting beside you on the battlefield. When you see the dark green capes and feathers of the Eslandolan Elite flying in the breeze nearby, it's high time to disappear! Eslandolan Milkmaid "Milk?" Not everyone in Eslandola spends all their time calculating income and discussing the laws of supply and demand - but that doesn't mean they're not busy enough laying out a neat profit. The Eslandolan Milkmaid knows there are DBs to be made with a pail of milk too, and, between her bucket, her wits, and her signature wink, she puts that knowledge to good account! Her Majesty's Royal Guard ".... .... ..." If the Eslandolan footman is quiet, Her Majesty of Corrington's Royal Guard is as silent as the grave. No one has ever been able to eke a sound out of him while he's on duty (though many little children, and some bigger children *ahem*, have tried it), but he doesn't think that immobility applies to the rest of his face. The Guard is constantly winking and making faces at everyone who passes by, and if others can never get him to laugh, it's rare enough that he can't get them to! Her Majesty's Vice-Admiral "Yes, make that 5.98305731 degrees past south on the compass, if you please." Her Majesty's Vice-Admiral is an extremely precise sort of person. Whatever he might be doing or ordering or directing, he's got it all figured out down to the hundredth thousandth of a percent and will make sure that it's not off by even the slightest measurement possible with a microscope. You might just be 0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% of a degree off on your voyage to Belson, such things add up in the long run! Or, at least, the Vice-Admiral is convinced that they do... Corringtonian Lighthouse Keeper's Daughter "That'll keep the lights shining out for miles all night!" Brought up by her father tending the lighthouse on a barren rock, the Lighthouse Keeper's Daughter feels as much at home in the lighthouse, guiding ships away from the dangerous shoals, as the Oleander girl feels in her favorite sitting room. The lantern and telescope are her constant companions, and she keeps the lamps burning impeccably every time her father needs to head off for some reason or another. Her Majesty's Grenadier Officer "Ready! seventeen Newtons of force - Set! at an angle of 47.5 degrees! Launch hand grenades!" Her Majesty's Grenadier Officer has never yet missed a target with his hand grenades - at least, not in theory. Unfortunately, however, by the time he's calculated exactly the speed the enemy is approaching, and the force and angle to launch at, it's usually already pretty close quarters - so Her Majesty saw fit to supply the regiment with rifles as well, to delay the enemy while the Officer is busy with the math. Now he's got to work out just the difference in the target's speed with the added factor too though, so it is to be doubted if a great deal of time is saved in the long run, after all! Garveyan Smuggler "One lantern... was that 'coast clear' or 'not clear'? Arr, shiver me timbers! - just go for it!" The Garveyan Smuggler loves running anything through that has got a contraband or tax on it - whether it's pigs, rice, Oleander uniforms, or Mardierians. You'll never spot him without his parrot on his shoulder and his cutlass in hand either, and the way he's constantly letting pirate lingo escape from him, some are rather doubtful whether he's not an infamous pirate in disguise or not. But one way or the other, don't mention taxes due in his presence if you're not ready to walk the plank! Raiding Sea Rat "Yarr! Avast there, or I'll blow ye to cinders! Or I may just do that anyways..." This Sea Rat is a pirate and a raider through-and-through, and all he lives for is the thrill of wreaking mayhem and havoc in peaceful or prosperous ports in the Brick Seas. And plundering and looting all their goods, of course - that's a given. It may seem like he always gets up on the wrong side of his bed, but the fact is, the Raider just isn't happy unless he's bellowing out pirate talk and stoving in windows! Highwayman "Stand and deliver! Or sit and deliver. Just the deliver part is really important." The highwayman may be a Sea Rat, but that doesn't mean he confines himself to Bastion or the other musty Sea Rat ports - no, as he says, his services are in demand everywhere in the Brick Seas; and he certainly is not remiss in rendering them whenever possible. With his black rapier, black hat, black mask, his "Stand and deliver!", and his signature grin, it is seldom indeed that he does not leave a few terrified citizens and empty purses behind him. Sea Rat Salt "Porridge? Again?!?" The experienced old Sea Rat Salt may know all his ropes well enough at sea, and be a master of the handspike and cannon, but if there's one thing that gets him, it's arriving back safely at port and finding that his old mother has prepared to celebrate his homecoming with porridge - again. His mother's always said that it's more of an accomplishment on her part to get him to swallow a spoonful of porridge than for it is for him to pick off the steersman of an man-o-war at 300 yards. But deep down, she's always been convinced that he really loves the stuff and is overwhelmed with an exhilarating tinge of nostalgia every time he sniffs the delicious smell of porridge wafting up the chimney. And there you have it! Thanks for viewing, C&C are welcome!
