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Let's pretend my voracious brother John took a lunch break, then?

I think I'll pull a minute amount of overtime. Ensure you don't consume all the remaining cheese, John? I feel the burgeoning desire for an omelet.

18 years? Pretty old for a dancer, if you ask me...

*gives his beloved brother John a big hug* Religion and a criminal life can and often do exist hand in hand - I remember reading a mystery novel where the perpetrator was in fact a clergyman... I would not be surprised in the least if something like this happened again. That being said, I have never directly accused you of being scum. And, just airing a thought here, perhaps the scum could pay a dancer better than the town could.

Susan, your subterfuge is as evident as your dancing skills. I would show a civilian evidence from a crime scene. I have the highest arrest record in Stapleton [in no small part due to my eradication of unlicensed horses from the city's streets], why would I risk my job for that? You've admitted to looking at evidence from a two-weeks old robbery, and claim that it was because 'I am deeply concerned that I'm next in line as a victim and want to get out of this sticky situation.' What sticky situation? The robbery took place well before the tragic murder of the BOI agents. John, I apologize - in the time it took me to compose my response, several other people had spoken.

Without legislation we are little more than yellow bipedal animals, John. You raise an intriguing point, John. How does a dancer gain access to 'security footage' [womanly wiles, I reckon]? And since we have no way of examining evidence from prior crimes in this game...of life, why do you pursue the point?

I certainly hope that any smoking guns we find are over the age of eighteen, as underage smoking is verboten within the city limits of Stapleton.

As an appendice to what Mr. Right [ooh! Mr. Right ] said, we can logically conclude that one of use here has usurped Tony's position as the Scum Godfather, I do believe.

Here you go, Lois, stirring up troubles... May I remind you that disruption of the public order is a civic offense?

I will drop my impressive, Brobdingnagian, and semi-superfluous vocabulary to speak frankly here. I suspect Lois has ulterior motives. With no basis in concrete proof, she tries to influence the town's police force. I won't say scum, that's a very dangerous word to say [and I know my words], but I'm suspicious.

You are Willy Wonka.

Desist the befuddling of my supine brother John. John was away 2 weeks ago. I am Christopher. Gene Wilder is our uncle.

My indolent brother John is out and about much of the time, I don't believe this means anything in the greater symphony of things.

I'm learning so many big words just trying to be in character, it's exhilarating!

Oh, us Wilders can take care of themselves. In fact, my illustrious paternal uncle Gene is quite the bohemian... I'll keep my vigilance around you, Lois. I shall keep one eye upon you. You see, us Wilders can also disconnect our eyes, quite like that of a chameleon.

Lois. Why did you insist I abandon my procrastinatory brother John so vehemently?

I for one am not a child. You, Lois, perturb me. I find your insistence that I leave my exceptionally somnolent brother John perplexing. What's your game? And for the record I am several minutes older than him.

I hope you're still enjoying the scented candles I bought you! And, Lois, I was a 'big boy' long before I received the thesaurus - in fact, it has been over a decade since my adolescence. However, this discussion of my vocabulary is counter-intuitive. If anything, we should be discussing any leads we have as to who these scum are, who have circumvented the law so flagrantly. They need to be arrested [by me, as I have a exemplary arrest record to maintain] and then promptly lynched, as I believe is the custom. Does anyone know of any suspicious goings-on?

I will not rest. I have procured enough "Red Bull", a herbal supplement from the Orient, for myself and my lackadaisical brother John. But with all seriousness, we need to discern the identities of these heinous perpetrators.

I concur with Louis and Roy. In fact, imitation of the blind is a civil offense, so I would not follow someone blindly in any case.

But, Batman's not due to be invented for several years! Do I need to write you up for unlicensed time travel? It is a civil offense within the jurisdiction of Stapleton.

Who, sir, is Two Face? Janus, the Roman god?

Bloody good show of you to arrive, Governor. The law must be laid down hard upon these, for want of a better word, scum. ...Stapleton, a more wretched hive of scum and villainy...

Two men of the force...dead? This is horrific. We see them lying face down, but they had faces to me, they had faces to the Chief, to my slacker brother John, to every other human being in this town. Obviously, such intolerable cruelty will not be tolerated.

Only one of those. They're effectively the same game with minor changes and different settings - I'd go with either Lego Indy or LSW. Assassin's Creed II for sure. Batman: Arkham Asylum, too. Also, get inFamous. It should be cheap now, and it's amazing.