"Georges!" yelled the Général, musket fire zipping overhead. "Georges! Where the hells are you?!"
"Here Monsieur!" answered the chef, meekly huddled on the floor.
"Georges, we have a problem!" yelled the old soldier.
"Oui Monsieur," replied his man. "We are being shot at." "Not that Georges! Much worse! I have run out of the Chateau de Filles again." He snapped off a shot from his pistol before ducking into cover. "Georges, I suspect there is a thief among the quartermaster's men. He must be stealing my wine."
"Oui Monsieur," was all he could reply, as a shot ripped apart the tree next to him.
"It wouldn't be you, would it Georges?" he asked, as he stepped across a space that had recently been filled with lead.
"Non Monsieur," pleaded the chef. "I cannot touch the red stuff. It gives me a rash!"
"Well when you find the swine, be sure to have him hung for treason, won't you?"
"Oui Monsieur," Georges replied glumly.
"And don't die before I get back. I'm going to need dinner early!" And with that he charged into the jungle, his men rallying behind him.