Mystery on the Excelsior - Chapter One

[Trekkie99]

2 minutes ago, Fugazi said:

I'm also an expert in electroconvulsive therapy, by the way. Electroshocks, that is.

Right. You just lost the privilege to even look in my general direction. If you do then I'll be forced to view it as a threat and I'll paint you as a mad scientist.

[Lind Whisperer]

Just now, Trekkie99 said:

Right. You just lost the privilege to even look in my general direction. If you do then I'll be forced to view it as a threat and I'll paint you as a mad scientist.

"Oliver, refresh our memory on your paintings... any particular masterpieces you'd like to talk about?"

[Trekkie99]

23 minutes ago, Lind Whisperer said:

"Oliver, refresh our memory on your paintings... any particular masterpieces you'd like to talk about?"

My personal favorite. A true masterpiece.

Spoiler

 

But how could I forget my most popular?

Spoiler

 

[Tariq j]

They are truly beautiful.

Could you do a painting of Colin? I know he’d love that.

[Fugazi]

2 hours ago, Trekkie99 said:

Right. You just lost the privilege to even look in my general direction. If you do then I'll be forced to view it as a threat and I'll paint you as a mad scientist. 

Do you always feel so easily threatened? Are people often talking about you, acting behind your back? Have you ever looked for hidden spying devices in your home? Is the government infiltrated by aliens?

I have the medicine you need.

[KotZ]

5 hours ago, jimmynick said:

Fascinating! I once saw a nature documentary about a bird that a third eye on the top of its head to keep watch for predators - I can’t remember its name but I know it lives on Mars. Is that one of the ones you saw?

It was! I was sure it would start speaking as well. But it did not.

4 hours ago, Bob said:

"This is the worst trip I've ever been on." 

Worst one you've been on so far.

4 hours ago, Lind Whisperer said:

"Please tell us about it anyways!"

Is that sarcasm, friend?

[Hinckley]

9 hours ago, Waterbrick Down said:

"Point taken, in that case should I make it a double?"

I flash a wan, half-sarcastic, half-appreciative smile at my crew friend...Stuart?...wait, no, his job is Steward, right, right. Ethan? Something like that. Anyway, I freakin' smile at him which is more than these high society bitches get. I admire Ethan Steward, whatever his name is for being able to smile while all these bourgey society shits badger and pester him. He's so patient. I'm not patient. What was I saying? Perhaps I'm getting a bit too tipsy.

"You know me so well," I manage.

I frown inwardly at the failure to convey my thoughts to Stewart...or Evan...or whoever. Or maybe I'll try to make another effort. I've known Arvid for years. Why not turn a friendly work relationship into a friendship?

"A beefy ginger like you is wasted in that stuffy white tux. I'd like to see you poured into an Engineer's boiler suit. Woof."

Ah, fuck. That was even worse.:facepalm:

9 hours ago, Shadows said:

*ahem* We DO NOT knock up the NPCs for a quick bang in the middle of the night.

And YOU do not fly the ship, you simply keep the engines in working order so that I may fly the ship.

I awkwardly turn and freeze, not ready with a quip like I am with anyone else. The one person I respect on this ship never seems to respect me.

"Yes, Sir, Captain!" I say as I salute her.

I step in close so the others won't overhear, "Maybe it's my mistrust of high society types and pseudo-celebrities, but I just sense tension here. I'm a bit worried but I can pinpoint why."

I bring my glass to my lips but before taking a sip I mutter, "Oh, is keeping the FTL drive working really so simple? "

I silently commend myself for my ability to mutter an eye roll.

5 hours ago, Bob said:

"This is the worst trip I've ever been on." 

I turn to the whiny little bitch and say, "At least you haven't been murdered yet!"

3 hours ago, Fugazi said:

 I'm also an expert in electroconvulsive therapy, by the way. Electroshocks, that is.

I eye the old geezer with an ounce of newfound respect.

Before I take another sip of my drink, I mutter, "Old pervert," then look away in case he heard me.

[Waterbrick Down]

4 hours ago, Pandora said:

Well, that is a very kind offer, but I find it best to engage in politics by talking to people on a more personal level. Too many of my predecessors would stand in front of large crowds and make sweeping promises that they clearly had no intention of keeping. I prefer to talk to individuals and small groups in a more interactive way to find ways to make society better for all of us, rather than lecture an intractable point of view. Obviously one has to forge ahead with a determined policy in order to get things done, but a representative should always be willing to accept feedback from her constituents. 

Another drink please steward.

Arthur returns with another Mimosa, "Your drink Mam, and may I say it's a privileged to have voted for you in the last election."

2 hours ago, Trekkie99 said:

My personal favorite. A true masterpiece.

  Hide contents

 

But how could I forget my most popular?

  Hide contents

 

"Mr. Hudson, I was under the impression that subject was censored by earth's central government years ago, no?"

12 minutes ago, Hinckley said:

I flash a wan, half-sarcastic, half-appreciative smile at my crew friend...Stuart?...wait, no, his job is Steward, right, right. Ethan? Something like that. Anyway, I freakin' smile at him which is more than these high society bitches get. I admire Ethan Steward, whatever his name is for being able to smile while all these bourgey society shits badger and pester him. He's so patient. I'm not patient. What was I saying? Perhaps I'm getting a bit too tipsy.

"You know me so well," I manage.

I frown inwardly at the failure to convey my thoughts to Stewart...or Evan...or whoever. Or maybe I'll try to make another effort. I've known Arvid for years. Why not turn a friendly work relationship into a friendship?

"A beefy ginger like you is wasted in that stuffy white tux. I'd like to see you poured into an Engineer's boiler suit. Woof."

Ah, fuck. That was even worse.:facepalm:

Arthur's eyebrows raise for a brief moment before he smiles with a nervous chuckle, "I've got to admit I much preferred my old fatigues to this ill tailored suit, but a job is a job. How is it you ended up on corporate carnival barge instead of something like a space force frigate or exploratory vessel? Surely your talents would be more appreciated there." The steward hands the engineer her drink.

[Hinckley]

10 minutes ago, Waterbrick Down said:

Arthur's eyebrows raise for a brief moment before he smiles with a nervous chuckle, "I've got to admit I much preferred my old fatigues to this ill tailored suit, but a job is a job. How is it you ended up on corporate carnival barge instead of something like a space force frigate or exploratory vessel? Surely your talents would be more appreciated there." The steward hands the engineer her drink.

       

"Oh, um..."

And then I sit there. Like a deer frozen in headlights. Nobody gives me compliments on this ship. Ever. What do I do? Stare. Stare like a deer in headlights.

"Thank you!"

Oh, that was good. Like human interaction.

"I...um...I really want to join one of the exploratory missions. I've been applying..."

I remember the walls have ears.

"Not that I don't love working for Blue Star, the best company in the solar system. And I would never leave. But I have sent my resume to the Extra-Solar Exploratory Commission several times. The maiden voyage of The Orion launches for The Pleiades in six months and I haven't heard back. It's such bureaucratic nonsense, though. I'm not good at that stuff. I'm good at Engineering. There aren't a lot of ships yet with FTL drives. The Excelsior is the only one in the Blue Star fleet. I'm in high demand for FTL drive engineering, but the ESEC is filled with bros that don't like to be commanded by women. I learned that in the United Earth Navy. I got a reputation pretty quickly for being slutty. Oh! That's not what I meant. I mispronounced intelligent. Men in leadership roles don't like intelligent women. How many years since the 19th amendment and women are still treated like that?"

Good save. There's an awkward silence so I sip my drink and then stir it with my finger. Then I remember there's a stirrer in my glass and I'm in a bougey lounge with high society types and this probably isn't a good idea. I feel like I should converse more if I'm going to be friends with Edward.

"I was on the first mission to Callisto. I got to play with the warblers that they captured. There was one that really latched on to me. I named him Sneezy. Warbler snot is actually super gross."

Maybe I'm talking about myself to much to forge a friendship...

"How are you? How is your spouse and offspring?"

[Waterbrick Down]

59 minutes ago, Hinckley said:

       

"Oh, um..."

And then I sit there. Like a deer frozen in headlights. Nobody gives me compliments on this ship. Ever. What do I do? Stare. Stare like a deer in headlights.

"Thank you!"

Oh, that was good. Like human interaction.

"I...um...I really want to join one of the exploratory missions. I've been applying..."

I remember the walls have ears.

"Not that I don't love working for Blue Star, the best company in the solar system. And I would never leave. But I have sent my resume to the Extra-Solar Exploratory Commission several times. The maiden voyage of The Orion launches for The Pleiades in six months and I haven't heard back. It's such bureaucratic nonsense, though. I'm not good at that stuff. I'm good at Engineering. There aren't a lot of ships yet with FTL drives. The Excelsior is the only one in the Blue Star fleet. I'm in high demand for FTL drive engineering, but the ESEC is filled with bros that don't like to be commanded by women. I learned that in the United Earth Navy. I got a reputation pretty quickly for being slutty. Oh! That's not what I meant. I mispronounced intelligent. Men in leadership roles don't like intelligent women. How many years since the 19th amendment and women are still treated like that?"

Good save. There's an awkward silence so I sip my drink and then stir it with my finger. Then I remember there's a stirrer in my glass and I'm in a bougey lounge with high society types and this probably isn't a good idea. I feel like I should converse more if I'm going to be friends with Edward.

"I was on the first mission to Callisto. I got to play with the warblers that they captured. There was one that really latched on to me. I named him Sneezy. Warbler snot is actually super gross."

Maybe I'm talking about myself to much to forge a friendship...

"How are you? How is your spouse and offspring?"

"You served in the navy did you, which outfit? I served myself back before I decided to take to the stars." Noting that no-one else seems to be in need of a drink at the moment, Arthur pours himself a scotch. "Ah, not much family to speak of. Father was a military man, split up with Ma early on and I ended up at boarding schools before enlisting. When I got out, I went straight to Blue Star, a few flings along the cruises, but those always ended when we made port." The steward takes a sip from his glass, "Never been to Callisto, I'm sure its lovely..."

[Hinckley]

32 minutes ago, Waterbrick Down said:

"You served in the navy did you, which outfit? I served myself back before I decided to take to the stars." Noting that no-one else seems to be in need of a drink at the moment, Arthur pours himself a scotch. "Ah, not much family to speak of. Father was a military man, split up with Ma early on and I ended up at boarding schools before enlisting. When I got out, I went straight to Blue Star, a few flings along the cruises, but those always ended when we made port." The steward takes a sip from his glass, "Never been to Callisto, I'm sure its lovely..."

Learning roleplays standards...

Gabriella's face lights up at the appearance of the scotch. It is a reasonable facsimile of a genuine human smile.

"My father drank scotch. Prefer Irish whiskey myself, but I'd join you for a scotch to our fathers."

The engineer takes a healthy swig of her martini.

"I think what's beautiful about Callisto is that everything is covered in ice. I'll never forget how when Jupiter rises, the light from the coronas reflect off of the ice. It fills the landscape with intersecting rainbows and long dripping strings of color that reflect off of the solar winds. I wasn't part of any of the exploratory missions. As Chief Engineer, I was tasked to stay with the ship, but the scientists made time to take people down to the surface who weren't on the missions. You can google me, I'm the first woman to step foot on Callisto. "

Gabriella takes a self-conscious sip from her drink.

"So, I was Chief Engineer for the Jovian Exploratory Fleet. My outfit designation is classified, though."

Gabriella starts to take a sip but slams her glass down.

"I'm sorry! Was that emasculating? Sometimes I forget the fragile male ego may be wounded by higher ranking females. I meant no offense. I actually wanted to be a pilot but I had a degree in Engineering so I went directly to officer school. I still wanted to pilot, but they needed me in Engineering. There aren't a lot of engineers who understand FTL drives. It comes as second nature to me."

[Trekkie99]

4 hours ago, Waterbrick Down said:

"Mr. Hudson, I was under the impression that subject was censored by earth's central government years ago, no?"

[Kristel]

9 hours ago, Lind Whisperer said:

"Sumatra? Tell us about it– or any other interesting place..."

"One of the little known islands of Indonesia, back on planet Earth.  Beautiful rainforests, crater lakes, home of the Pandang carry. One of the many places I've visited in my quest to learn about different food cultures."

 

7 hours ago, Fugazi said:

But if you insist, I think everyone here needs pills.

"I could use one of those."

[Bob]

4 hours ago, Hinckley said:

I turn to the whiny little bitch and say, "At least you haven't been murdered yet!"

Ezra Parry has since departed for his cabin, a bit fed up over the line of questioning.

It is currently nearing the dinner service...

[Trekkie99]

5 hours ago, Fugazi said:

Is the government infiltrated by aliens?

I thought we invited them. Gotta get that tech am I right?

7 hours ago, Tariq j said:

They are truly beautiful.

Could you do a painting of Colin? I know he’d love that.

Done.

Spoiler

 

15 minutes ago, Bob said:

It is currently nearing the dinner service...

Wonder what Noah's gonna feed us this time. Hungry Man sailsbury steak?

With a side of tator tots? But that'll be the second course. The first will probably be cream of mushroom soup (and it won't even be Campbells it'll be some house brand), and for dessert he'll throw together a box cake.

[jimmynick]

4 hours ago, Hinckley said:

The maiden voyage of The Orion launches for The Pleiades in six months and I haven't heard back.

"Hope this voyage is a success then so we can get home!" Emily gazes out of the viewing window, fingers turning nervously in her pockets. That's right, in the days of intergalactic travel, womens' suits have pockets!

58 minutes ago, Bob said:

Ezra Parry has since departed for his cabin, a bit fed up over the line of questioning.

It is currently nearing the dinner service...

"And he never even brought me that martini I asked for! Can't get good help these days, can you? Garçon?"

3 hours ago, Waterbrick Down said:

Father was a military man, split up with Ma early on and I ended up at boarding schools before enlisting.

"The kick-your-butt-into-shape military academy type, or the morning suit and canings type? I myself attended a a finishing school perched on a rock above Zürich. Can't say I enjoyed learning how to pour tea and to iron a fitted sheet, I was much happier shouting down stubborn men on the Intra-System Commerce Review when I was at law school. Of course now I can't iron or pour tea or do any of the frou-frou Swiss school things, which brings me back to the help!" Emily sucks on her teeth.

48 minutes ago, Trekkie99 said:

Done.

"Oh good! A lighthearted but vivacious interpretation of Colin's visage. I was afraid it would come out more like this:"

Spoiler

 

[Trekkie99]

5 minutes ago, jimmynick said:

"Oh good! A lighthearted but vivacious interpretation of Colin's visage. I was afraid it would come out more like this:"

  Reveal hidden contents

 

Yes my desired goal for the piece was very simple you see. Not getting eaten. Same reason you should always paint your trees as a happy little trees. Otherwise they'll snatch you from the ground and impale you on their branches as if to wear you as a hat.

[Waterbrick Down]

7 hours ago, Hinckley said:

Learning roleplays standards...

Gabriella's face lights up at the appearance of the scotch. It is a reasonable facsimile of a genuine human smile.

"My father drank scotch. Prefer Irish whiskey myself, but I'd join you for a scotch to our fathers."

The engineer takes a healthy swig of her martini.

"I think what's beautiful about Callisto is that everything is covered in ice. I'll never forget how when Jupiter rises, the light from the coronas reflect off of the ice. It fills the landscape with intersecting rainbows and long dripping strings of color that reflect off of the solar winds. I wasn't part of any of the exploratory missions. As Chief Engineer, I was tasked to stay with the ship, but the scientists made time to take people down to the surface who weren't on the missions. You can google me, I'm the first woman to step foot on Callisto. "

Gabriella takes a self-conscious sip from her drink.

"So, I was Chief Engineer for the Jovian Exploratory Fleet. My outfit designation is classified, though."

Gabriella starts to take a sip but slams her glass down.

"I'm sorry! Was that emasculating? Sometimes I forget the fragile male ego may be wounded by higher ranking females. I meant no offense. I actually wanted to be a pilot but I had a degree in Engineering so I went directly to officer school. I still wanted to pilot, but they needed me in Engineering. There aren't a lot of engineers who understand FTL drives. It comes as second nature to me."

Arthur pours Gabriella a finger of the scotch, "To fathers, may their memories be... remembered." Arthur takes a sip of the single malt, "No need to be ashamed of your accomplishments, you earned them, might as well reap your rewards..." Arthur pauses for a moment lost in thought, "That description of Callisto, makes me want visit myself, can only imagine the memories such a place would create. 'Xcuse me one moment."

4 hours ago, jimmynick said:

"And he never even brought me that martini I asked for! Can't get good help these days, can you? Garçon?"

"The kick-your-butt-into-shape military academy type, or the morning suit and canings type? I myself attended a a finishing school perched on a rock above Zürich. Can't say I enjoyed learning how to pour tea and to iron a fitted sheet, I was much happier shouting down stubborn men on the Intra-System Commerce Review when I was at law school. Of course now I can't iron or pour tea or do any of the frou-frou Swiss school things, which brings me back to the help!" Emily sucks on her teeth.

Arthur feigned a smile as he made the lawyer her drink, "My apologies mam, how dry do you prefer your drink? As for schooling, east end of New Chicago, suits were to be pressed and the canings were plentiful. I may have missed it, you and your husband traveling to Alpha Centauri on... business was it?"

[KotZ]

WHAT THE HELL IS IN MY CABIN????

Someone or something put a demonic object in my medicine cabinet. It looks... stuffed. Is this normal? Who accessed my room? May I see a list of people who accessed it?

[Waterbrick Down]

5 minutes ago, KotZ said:

WHAT THE HELL IS IN MY CABIN????

Someone or something put a demonic object in my medicine cabinet. It looks... stuffed. Is this normal? Who accessed my room? May I see a list of people who accessed it?

"I'm sorry Mr. Mallory, but what seems to be the problem?"

[Hinckley]

14 minutes ago, Waterbrick Down said:

Arthur pours Gabriella a finger of the scotch, "To fathers, may their memories be... remembered." Arthur takes a sip of the single malt, "No need to be ashamed of your accomplishments, you earned them, might as well reap your rewards..." Arthur pauses for a moment lost in thought, "That description of Callisto, makes me want visit myself, can only imagine the memories such a place would create. 'Xcuse me one moment."

Gabriella nods as the steward turns to the guest. She suddenly swears to herself for forgetting to ask the stewards questions about him, instead of rambling about herself.

3 minutes ago, KotZ said:

WHAT THE HELL IS IN MY CABIN????

Someone or something put a demonic object in my medicine cabinet. It looks... stuffed. Is this normal? Who accessed my room? May I see a list of people who accessed it?

"Oh, is this that type of mystery? Oooh, maybe someone will be possessed! So, there was a demon in your medicine cabinet?"

Gabriella gets up from her bar stool, excited with a new thought.

"Maybe you've been poisoned at you're hallucinating it. I mean, no offense, but it sounds pretty crazy. A stuffed demon? Like, with an apple in its mouth, on a platter? Can you be more specific about what you've found? Do you have the demon on you right now?"

[KotZ]

2 minutes ago, Waterbrick Down said:

"I'm sorry Mr. Mallory, but what seems to be the problem?"

Somebody stuck a plush object in my medicine cabinet. That's the problem. I put a hair on all of my doors to see if somebody has opened doors. And well my doors have been opened and there is a plush toy in my medicine cabinet. My medicine cabinet! Be assured, I will leave a 1 star review.

2 minutes ago, Hinckley said:

"Oh, is this that type of mystery? Oooh, maybe someone will be possessed! So, there was a demon in your medicine cabinet?"

Gabriella gets up from her bar stool, excited with a new thought.

"Maybe you've been poisoned at you're hallucinating it. I mean, no offense, but it sounds pretty crazy. A stuffed demon? Like, with an apple in its mouth, on a platter? Can you be more specific about what you've found? Do you have the demon on you right now?"

Alright, maybe I overreacted It's not demonic. But it looks demonic. It's stuffed. It looks like an invader. It is green. It's ugly. I'm staring at it.

[Hinckley]

1 hour ago, KotZ said:

Somebody stuck a plush object in my medicine cabinet. That's the problem. I put a hair on all of my doors to see if somebody has opened doors. And well my doors have been opened and there is a plush toy in my medicine cabinet. My medicine cabinet! Be assured, I will leave a 1 star review.

Alright, maybe I overreacted It's not demonic. But it looks demonic. It's stuffed. It looks like an invader. It is green. It's ugly. I'm staring at it.

Gabriella looks confused. She starts to speak, thinks better of it, and returns to her drinks instead. She takes a sip of her martini, then changes her mind again.

"A hair??"

[Waterbrick Down]

1 hour ago, KotZ said:

Somebody stuck a plush object in my medicine cabinet. That's the problem. I put a hair on all of my doors to see if somebody has opened doors. And well my doors have been opened and there is a plush toy in my medicine cabinet. My medicine cabinet! Be assured, I will leave a 1 star review.

Alright, maybe I overreacted It's not demonic. But it looks demonic. It's stuffed. It looks like an invader. It is green. It's ugly. I'm staring at it.

"Mr. Mallory, please know that Blue Star Cruises will gladly investigate the matter. We take great pride in the security and privacy of our passengers. Now please, provide as many details as you can. Firstly, does the object in question resemble this?"

[Hinckley]

"Or perhaps like this?"

"If it's a physical object, can't you just show it to us? I mean, is this a real thing or are you just role playing?"

*that was the first image that came up when I googled "LEGO plush demon."