James Wellington Posted January 23, 2015 (edited) [soNE Freebuild] "Transmissions" Please comment, tell me what you think, it helps me to better perform next time. This is my second Episode. INTRODUCTION: After a few days of being on the Star Destroyer "Tyrant", there was little talk of the mission. B-Squad spread throughout the cruiser, and started to explore the ship and get some rest. Here they wait for news of their important mission. But will that mission get delayed? Star Destroyer "Tyrant", Brick System, 2 ABY. SONEe2s1 by BrickJamesWells, on Flickr Captain Vars: Continue to look for any Imperial Transmissions. SONEe2s2 by BrickJamesWells, on Flickr *Meanwhile, James walks in the hallways not far from the communications room. SONEe2s3 by BrickJamesWells, on Flickr Captain Vars: Ah, James, I've been looking for you. Seeing you're not doing anything, can you take control of the communications room for a short time? The officers and I have a meeting to attend. SONEe2s4 by BrickJamesWells, on Flickr James: Oh...uh, me Sir? Well, I guess I could, bu- Captain Vars: Excellent! Come in, come in. SONEe2s5 by BrickJamesWells, on Flickr SONEe2s6 by BrickJamesWells, on Flickr Captain Vars: Please monitor the controls and transmissions. It is important you catch any incoming Imperial hologram transmissions. If one comes in, contact me or a nearby officer, and we will handle it. Do that and you should be fine. My officers and I will be back shortly after the meeting. I thank you for your help. James: Always happy to help, I guess. Captain Vars: Excellent! I'm getting to like you already. Well, I guess we should be on our way then. Best of luck, Corporal! SONEe2s7 by BrickJamesWells, on Flickr SONEe2s8 by BrickJamesWells, on Flickr James: Huh... Well, this will be boring... *Sigh* Why couldn't I of just become a TIE Fighter Pilot? I bet they don't have to do this! Hmff. SONEe2s9 by BrickJamesWells, on Flickr *Boom-Beep Boom-Beep* Mysterious Transmission Voice: *Krrrrrrr* This is *krrrrr* Captain Leh *krrrr* of the *krr* Imperial Base on Coreillia *krr* we've been pushed out by rebels, we need urgent help *krrr*. They are *krrr* chasing us down! We need reinforcements! *krr* James: This is Stormtrooper Corporal James of the Star Destroyer Tyrant, I will try to get the captain to bring reinforcements! Stay strong, Captain, help is on the way! SONEe2s10 by BrickJamesWells, on Flickr See what happens next in Episode 3! Please comment, and tell me what you thought! Edited January 23, 2015 by James Wellington Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GuyDudeMan27 Posted January 23, 2015 I like your story so far. One problem is the camera is way too zoomed in. I think if you pulled back the camera the whole thing would look better. It's ok if the build doesn't entirely take up the picture, as long as the background is nice and clean. I would suggest making an infinity sweep (Google it if you want to make one) and putting the build in there. The build itself looks good, but it's too zoomed in to see very well. I think you and your character are great, but could definitely use some work. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
James Wellington Posted January 23, 2015 I like your story so far. One problem is the camera is way too zoomed in. I think if you pulled back the camera the whole thing would look better. It's ok if the build doesn't entirely take up the picture, as long as the background is nice and clean. I would suggest making an infinity sweep (Google it if you want to make one) and putting the build in there. The build itself looks good, but it's too zoomed in to see very well. I think you and your character are great, but could definitely use some work. Glad you like the story so far. I agree with the camera thing. I will try and take your advice to improve my pictures and overall look of everything. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tariq j Posted January 23, 2015 Great story, from what I can see your build resembles the interior of a Star Destroyer very well Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
markus1984 Posted January 23, 2015 The story and builds are good! But i think the scenes are a little bit to small - maybe bigger backdrop? But the rest is very nice! markus Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
James Wellington Posted January 23, 2015 Great story, from what I can see your build resembles the interior of a Star Destroyer very well The story and builds are good! But i think the scenes are a little bit to small - maybe bigger backdrop? But the rest is very nice! markus Thank you guys. I tried my best to build an accurate Star Destroyer hallway. The scenes are a little small, and perhaps a bigger backdrop would help. I'll see what I can do. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MKJoshA Posted January 28, 2015 Good 2nd build! You've already had feedback on bringing the camera further out, I think that will help. And maybe try experimenting with more details along the interior. What you have as far as walls and doorways gets the idea across that it's a SD. But maybe if you had some pipes, vents, or even a mouse droid every now and then it would help a lot. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
James Wellington Posted January 28, 2015 Alright. I'll see what I can do with the hallways and little build details. As for the pictures, I'll try my best to get every detail, and good quality with the pictures. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shadows of Nar Eurbrikka Posted February 7, 2015 Judges have awarded you 2 XP! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
James Wellington Posted February 7, 2015 Thank you! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
