TwistedDreams Posted June 13, 2007 Posted June 13, 2007 (edited) Well I've been asking for help here and there about my upcoming movie: Pirates of the Seventh Sea! Now, I'm still in the scripting thought process just so you know. So I was wondering, anybody got ideas!? Pirates of the Seventh Sea The story: prequel scene. ______Simple harbor town is quite peaceful, showing average day at closing time, around 6:00ish, when its almost dark. But there is a surprise! The 'young lads father is coming home! and a few friends have gathered at the house with the Mom and the young lad waiting. The lad is about 6 maybe 7. But as soon as the boat dock, and starts unloading, A pirate ship comes from around the corner! The whole town goes into lock up and war. But the little kid is determined to see his father again. So he escapes his mothers clutches, and runs into the street towards the harbor, towards the pirates. Cannons are flying all around him. the Pirates are docking just as he's getting close. He sees his father, but then the pirates are boarding the ship. And he is only ten feet from his father when he sees his father get stabbed with a sword, and his father falls from the boat right to the kids feet, and says, "Never be weak son, never be weak..." dies. Later in Life: ______Young lad (now 20 or so), and highly ranked naval officer both in one harbor town. The both fall in love with a women, and grow too hate each other for it. Then, the kid gets in a fight of some sort with a Pirate captain at a bar (he doesn't think he's a pirate at first). And when they fight, he kills him, and finds a paper with a seal on it. The same seal he saw as a kid, so he takes it and runs. He knows he will be hung for his murder, so he hops on a ship as a stowaway, the ship being commanded by the Naval officer. He unrolls the paper and it's a map! He attempts escape at the next port but he gets onto a pirate ship through the scuffle, because the town is being looted. In the scuffle the Naval Officer glances back, and sees the young lad running off, and attempts to catch him, but fails. He finds out that the pirates are looking for the map, and he has it. But the pirates don't know that yet, or who he is. So he stays on board as a prisoner, but they are going to find the pirate in his home town, but as soon as he gets there he knows the pirates will kill him for the map, and the town will kill him for the murder (people saw it). ______So he escapes onto a ship during a battle, that was heading for the looted port to catch the pirates. But the ship gets blown up, and he survives on the floating ruins, and gets stranded on a small island. When he got to the other ship, a naval dude sees the map and recognizes it. But then when the young lad gets the island, he peers back and hears him screaming, and he knows they will begin to hunt for him soon. The Ship commanded by the Naval Officer then comes by the Destroyed ships wreckage. He's waving his arms, and the ships crew comes on the island and get him on the ship. The Naval officer knows he has the map, but waits until the night falls to pas him out, steal the map, and throw him over board. He floats until dawn, when the pirate ship comes through the fog. They take him aboard, recognizing him as the one with the map. But when he tells them the naval officer has it, the keep him prisoner (again), and go after the Naval officer's ship. They find out at the next port that they are heading for the place where the map locates. ______The pirates know where The island is, just not the treasure, so they chase them. During the trip, the captain and the young lad talk about how neither of them had their fathers around when they were young, and the captain almost feels for the young lad. So when they get to the island they see the naval ship, and go to it. But it was manned quite heavily. So they run to the center of the island for cover, and they see the naval Officer's crew and have a fight, everyone dies someway or another, except the Pirate captain, the Naval Officer, and the young lad. They all fight for the map, and the Naval officer gets away with it. The boy gets up soon, but instead of running after the Naval officer, he helps up the Pirate Captain. They say some line (undetermined) that also came up in the talks about there fathers. Then they run after the Naval officer. And there is a big fight scene, And in the midst, the pirates Show up (from the ship), and Watch the young lad kill the naval officer as he shoots The Captain. They boy immediately goes to the Captain, who is barley alive. Then a large group of the Naval officers come in, and open fire on the pirates crew. They return fire, and escape to their ship in a dash. The ship then roams off, and the Naval crew returns to their ship. Then the Captain dies on the ship, with the young lad close to him, and the whole ship sees him become captain of the ship. Then one pirate says, "where to now, Captain?"But then we see the Naval Officer, just barley standing, holding a bleeding wound. Saying something along the lines of: "I'm going to get you back, (yells young lads name). ------------------------------------------------------------------ Now, Please comment ONLY if you read the whole story. Because there are a few things I'm having trouble with. A. The Women isn't involved enough X-O , any ideas as too how I could put her in the story? C. The Lad needs to get with the girl in the end! Any Names ideas would be nice. Main Character List: Young lad Pirate Women Naval Officer Any good Pirate CREW names would also be helpful. Any shot ideas, Scripting ideas, ect. more than welcome! -TD Edited June 13, 2007 by TwistedDreams Quote
Governor Mister Phes Posted June 13, 2007 Governor Posted June 13, 2007 I haven't read the story but I'm going to comment anyway to inform you that story threads don't tend to succeed very well. But it might help if you broke up the paragraphs by putting a space between them... Quote
TwistedDreams Posted June 13, 2007 Author Posted June 13, 2007 Alright It's ready to read now. I'm going to post this on brick films (when it gets up :( ) -TD Quote
Kahgarak Posted June 13, 2007 Posted June 13, 2007 Very nice! I think a monkey with a gun called Mr. Johnson would be a nice crewman. Hope that helps a little! Good luck,lad. Quote
TwistedDreams Posted June 13, 2007 Author Posted June 13, 2007 hah! A monkey, thats what I'm missing! lol, Mr. Johnson sounds good ;) . -TD Quote
Izzy Posted June 13, 2007 Posted June 13, 2007 (edited) When the Lad becomes the Pirate Captain, he might need a better and different name to whatever he was called as just the Lad, (for example from 'Joe' to 'Cap'n Ironhook' or the like) also if the Woman is going to be with him in the end when he is a Pirate, she might need a Pirate name too. For good measure. - Cutlass Iz is a good Pirate name and Izabella is a good Womans name. HAHAHA. Edited June 13, 2007 by cutlass_iz Quote
Athos Posted June 13, 2007 Posted June 13, 2007 hah! A monkey, thats what I'm missing! lol, Mr. Johnson sounds good ;) .-TD Not just a monkey, a monkey with a gun! Much funnier that way... Steve Quote
TwistedDreams Posted June 14, 2007 Author Posted June 14, 2007 ^ooh, good idea :). ^^Maybe a pirates crew member that says, "where to now, captain :::) the ::: being the new name, like the crew member gives him his name, they all be like: "hoorah! hoorah!" thanks,this story is ever-evolving into a masterpiece! -TD Quote
Izzy Posted June 14, 2007 Posted June 14, 2007 If you don't want the Woman to be all pirate like, is she going to be on of those girl thats always wears a dress and is prim and proper and delicate and the like??? Maybe she is for some reason in the bar (in the original fight scene) and she deciedes to help the Lad win the fight when she has no reason to, and it is totally against her charater... therefore he starts to like her. Maybe she grabs someones cutlass and throws it to him and that is how he kills the Pirate dude, then grabs the map and runs. and then later on in a scene between them on the ship at the end he is being all "close" with her and reminds her of this moment when she helped him and he started to like her... and jokingly calls her (in a pathetic fake pirate accent) "Cutlass Iz" but some of the real pirates are eavsdropping on them (hoping to hear something juicy) and find this hilarious. and in the morning when the Woman and the Lad/new Captain come out of the Captains quarters the Pirates present her with her own cutlass and she gets all embaressed coz she knows they were listening and its is funny and everyone laughs. The End. Quote
TwistedDreams Posted June 14, 2007 Author Posted June 14, 2007 ^Thats a good start. I GOT IT! She was on the ship back to the port that gets looted, because she wanted to find him and tell him she loved him. And when they are on the ship together, before it gets blown up, she tells him she loves him, and he says he loves her too. And when he passes out the young lad (need a name :/ ), he keeps the girl and tries to get her to marry before they go back to there hometown. But when she says no, He says screw it, and goes for the treasure. And when they all meet up at the treasure, They'll get the treasure! oooh, This is good. -TD Quote
Izzy Posted June 15, 2007 Posted June 15, 2007 Have you thought of using one of the Pirate name generators for your characters. Personally I find them exteremly aggrivating. My name came out as Iron Mary Cross or some rubbish. Quote
TwistedDreams Posted June 21, 2007 Author Posted June 21, 2007 ^No, but I did find a list of pirate names that have some good ones and I'll use or modify some of those. But I will show you the beginning of my pirate ship soon. It's not looking half bad for a first ship if I do say so myself. Its a wide hull with two mid sections. I will post pics in a few days. -TD Quote
Izzy Posted June 22, 2007 Posted June 22, 2007 Edourdo Barbossa!!! *wub* That is a real name! *y* AND he works for THe LEGO Group. *sweet* In the Pirate Section of Admin. X-D Quote
TwistedDreams Posted June 22, 2007 Author Posted June 22, 2007 thanks for the name suggestions! I'm still very open to any suggestions I'm still not set on any names yet... -TD Quote
Governor Mister Phes Posted July 4, 2007 Governor Posted July 4, 2007 AND he works for THe LEGO Group. *sweet* In the Pirate Section of Admin. X-D Which seems to be defunct since 1997... Quote
TwistedDreams Posted July 4, 2007 Author Posted July 4, 2007 I know you guys are all on the edges of your seats to wait to hear about what I'm going to do next for this movie *double thumbs up AND a wink*. But right now I'm almost ready to put on my first lot of LEGOs that I'm going to sell, get my second and third ships, and prepare the island scene. so... not much going on, but I will show you my ships when they're done, along with the Island. -TD Quote
Norrington Posted July 5, 2007 Posted July 5, 2007 Well, I havn't coomented yet, but it could definatly use at least ONE musical number. Or better yet, make it an opera! Opera ON! Quote
TwistedDreams Posted July 5, 2007 Author Posted July 5, 2007 I'm using all of the songs from the PotC movie. -TD Quote
Norrington Posted July 5, 2007 Posted July 5, 2007 (edited) I'm using all of the songs from the PotC movie.-TD By Muscial Number, I mean the characters sing lyrics! By Opera, I mean they all sing all their lines. *EDIT* Here are some examples from Futurama: Opera: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ixHO1A9vzI Here, all charcters sing all their lines through the whole opera. None is spoken. Musical Number: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_xYsRcVN1BU Here, the charcters are talking normaly, then begin singing together. AFter they sing, they begin talking normaly again. Edited July 5, 2007 by Norrington Quote
TwistedDreams Posted July 6, 2007 Author Posted July 6, 2007 ^the opera idea scares me a bit, and a musical number isn't what I'm going for :( . But thank you for the idea's! -TD Quote
Norrington Posted July 6, 2007 Posted July 6, 2007 An adversity to Opera?! Mozart would be ashamed! Hang him! J/K. Though it could use some kind of singing. How 'bout using this song from Muppet Treasure Island, just with new visuals: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5ddks-lTg4 Quote
TwistedDreams Posted July 10, 2007 Author Posted July 10, 2007 ^now that I've seen that I might do something like that. But that would a TON of work. But that is a good idea. -TD Quote
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