The Crazy One Posted October 17, 2009 Posted October 17, 2009 (edited) I KNOW I MISSPLET ASSASSIN, I AM USING A CRUMMY KEYBARD. Good evening, this little excerpt is a teaser for my new story, ' The Assassin '. It takes place in the dieing years of the Galactic Civil War, when the war was at its fiercest, with traitors on every side. This transmisson came from the last moments of Rebel Fleet Commander, Larz Lysander, and his fleet. ++ This is commander Lysander, does anyone read me? ++ ++ Copy that, this is private Carry, I am on B deck ++ ++ It is good to here a familar voice, now Carry, you must make it to the Bridge, the ship is in ruins, I am alone. ++ ++ Yes sir, I will make it ........ ++ ++ Carry? Do you copy? ++ ++ Er....yes, I just though I saw something....++ ++ Just make it to the Bridge, now. ++ ++ Yes sir, oh my go....* screams * ++ ++ Carry!!! Do you copy?? Do you read me?? ++ ++ Hello Lysander. ++ ++ Who is this? ++ ++ You know me well, but I will not tell you, you shall see soon enough. ++ ++ No you wont, Bridge lockdown activated. ++ ++ Nice try, but you are too late. ++ ++ What do you mean? ++ ++ I'm already here. ++ ++ What? No........you!! ++ ++ Yes, long time no see Lysander. ++ ++ You wont get away with this, Admiral Ackbar, this is my final transmisson, the assasin is here, and the fleet is decimated, get Skywalker, he will....... ++ ++ Brave, but foolish, you are now going to die. ++ ++ Transmisson ends. ++ All comments welcome gentlemen, I am happy for any ideas on how to continue. In the next insert, pictures will be added. The Crazy One. Edited October 17, 2009 by The crazy one Quote
KimT Posted October 17, 2009 Posted October 17, 2009 Nothing LEGO Star Wars in this. Sounds more like a story or something. I'll move this to Culture & Multimedia Quote
The Crazy One Posted October 17, 2009 Author Posted October 17, 2009 Nothing LEGO Star Wars in this.Sounds more like a story or something. I'll move this to Culture & Multimedia I was going to add in scenes and figures in later updates, I just hadn't finished them. Should I keep posting ones with scenes in this forum? Quote
Professor Flitwick Posted October 17, 2009 Posted October 17, 2009 A very intriguing introduction to your story, it defiantly makes me want to read more and I look forward to seeing pictures (though if you turn it into a comic, it may once again be in the wrong section). One small note though, I believe you misspelled assassin. Quote
The Crazy One Posted October 17, 2009 Author Posted October 17, 2009 A very intriguing introduction to your story, it defiantly makes me want to read more and I look forward to seeing pictures (though if you turn it into a comic, it may once again be in the wrong section). One small note though, I believe you misspelled assassin. Thanks. I realised I misspelt assassin after I posted it sadly. Quote
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