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Signing the Peace Treaty


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18 replies to this topic  – Started by Vladimir Leonov , Oct 02 2009 11:01 AM

#1 Vladimir Leonov

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Posted 02 October 2009 - 11:01 AM

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After many years of endless bloodshed and fighting, Redbeard and the Governor finally decided to lay down their arms and come to a peace settlement. Here we can see the Governor and the Captain discussing terms while a soon to be out-of-work soldier patrols the roof above.

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Edited by SlyOwl, 02 December 2009 - 09:33 PM.


#2 Captain Blackmoor

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Posted 02 October 2009 - 12:52 PM

I like the idea, but there is room for improvement on the entry.

1: Some more details, a map and several charts, goblets or a feather and ink on the table. Perhaps even some extra pieces of furniture, a lamp at the ceiling. Be creative and it will turn out great.

2: I'm not too fond of the yellow/red wall. The floor is okay but the colours just don't fit on a wall. Grey or white would do a better job.

No doubt it will be even better with those improvements. :pir-cry_happy:
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#3 Admiral Croissant

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Posted 02 October 2009 - 02:18 PM

I agree with Captain Blackmoor. You can make things clearer by (for example) letting them sake hands or sign a peace treaty. But the idea is really nice, it will do fine with those improvements. :thumbup:
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#4 Bricknave

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Posted 02 October 2009 - 05:06 PM

This is a very well-built vignette!  I admire the MOC concept and the smooth tile plates on the floor.  :pir-classic:

I agree with Blackmoor and Green Buns, I dislike the red+yellow combination and extremely hollow room.  However, I also dislike the grill plates on the table; I think they should be replaced with regular smooth tile plates.  Another thing I think could use some improvement is the Battlement wall on top that the soldier is standing next too; I think it should be taller.

Edited by Bricknave, 02 October 2009 - 05:13 PM.

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#5 Lorentzen

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Posted 02 October 2009 - 06:17 PM

Excellent idea - simple yet effective MOC with room for improvements in different aspects if you ask me  :pir-classic:

First of:

I would suggest that you try to take some better pictures. It seems to me that you didn't use the flash on your camera and that's why the pictures are blurry.

Also if you want to take pictures in close-up, remember to select the "macro" function. The universal icon for that is a flower (a tulip actually)
When you're using the "macro" function, images at a very close range will be much clearer. But the most important thing is to take the picture where there's a LOT of light (It looks like you had sufficient light as you took those pictures though  :thumbup:  )

The MOC itself:

Even though I like what I see, I still feel that this MOC could benefit from more details, and perhaps a better colourscheme. Maybe a different pattern on the floor, a picture on the wall or a plant in a large pot. As somebody mentioned, it would definitely be a good idea to have the Governor and Captain interact in some way.

Earlier this year, the was a Captain's Cabin Contest, and in that contest we saw numerous ideas for furnituring a room, and we saw different ideas that created the illusion that a desk perhaps had a feather to write documents with.

Here's the "official" contest picture:
I know you haven't attempted building a cabin, but still this pictures could give you numerous ideas for spicing up your MOC
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#6 Vladimir Leonov

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Posted 02 October 2009 - 06:36 PM

Thanks for the comments. I've never really participated in one of these things before and until recently, I hadn't touched a lego brick since '96. :pir-cry_sad: Anyways, here was a solution to some of the comments made, tell me what y'all think. (also, I apologize about the poor photo quality. There is really nothing I can do about it. I have an awful digital camera from the turn of the century and the camera on my phone. Neither does close ups very well.)

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#7 The Alchemyst

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Posted 03 October 2009 - 03:04 AM

Well it's nice coming out of your Dark Age isn't it?  :pir-tongue:

I suggest taking completely new pictures though. The color is nice and bright in the first one, but the white is much too overexposed. The second one has lower brightness, but it loses the shine.  :pir-sceptic:

A darker background, black, dark blue or something of the sort would work really well here. Are you taking these with the flash on? If so, then I'd suggest turning it off and getting some sunlight or some lamps. Also check for a Macro mode, although I'm not sure if such an old camera has something like that.  :pir-hmpf_bad:

The new version seems better. I'm not a fan of all the loss of color, but the statue [If you could use some gray instead of black, it'd be fabulous], the scripts as the treaty and redone table is nice. The flag and the barrel are nice small touches at the top to make it less boring as well.

I suggest adding some action of some sorts though. Have the solider put his musket on his shoulder and trot. Have the two down below talking or shake hands, like others have mentioned. These small actions in minifigs can really bring a vignette to life.

While I like the white than the garish yellow and red from before, it seems boring and lacking. Some red accents [To symbolize the Redcoats. :P] on the wall would be nice. Maybe some of These Windows would work well, if you have any. Some plates or these in red on the top could work as well.

Anyway I like the idea, it's very realistic and all. Photo could be better, but I understand what you mean about a bad camera.  Best of luck!

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#8 badboytje88

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Posted 03 October 2009 - 07:43 AM

Wow I really like the changes you made so far. You really listened to some of the advise people gave you. The only thing I'd change is the pics. They are still a little bit blurry and a little bit too light. The MOC itself is exellent.

#9 Imperial Shipyards

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Posted 03 October 2009 - 01:48 PM

The peace treaty itself is a great idea in my opinion.

But well, if I were you I would SNOT the floor instead of tiling it to make it look more like marble. Also, the use of SNOT makes every MOC more interesting.  :pir-classic:

http://www.bricklink...Item.asp?P=2436
I would suggest using these brackets; they allow a SNOT floor without any visible changes to the outer wall.

http://www.bricklink...Item.asp?P=4070
You could use 1x1 bricks with headlights for the table legs which I would do using 1x1 cones. a plate below the table can attach it to the wall.

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#10 Paul cantu

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Posted 03 October 2009 - 08:09 PM

I think you have come up with a great idea. I really like the charts on the table and the statue is also nice. The appearance as if the treaty is in a fort is also built nicely.
Suggestions:
-Add an ink bottle to the table.
-Include a feather piece or some other piece to the hands of the pirate captain and the governor to look like they are signing the document with something.
-It looks like no one else is at the treaty so you might want to add another pirate behind the captain and an imperial officer behind the governor.
-A parrot would look nice on the empty battlement and another musket would look good in the barrel.

#11 MetroiD

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Posted 03 October 2009 - 11:56 PM

Ah, the perfect MOC bearing in mind the character of this year's contest. Good job Vladimir :)

While I'm not convinced that this one needs _too_ many new details added to it, I would suggest having the pirate and the admiral shake hands. I believe that should help convey this entry's idea. Looking forward to seeing your progress on this one, it does look extremely promising! Have fun :pir-classic:

P.S.: Another suggestion: try and think of more symbols that could be related to peace in general. Somehow I feel that the guard on sentry up there does not quite fit in here. Some custom-built white doves in the hands of a few dirty and salty seadogs perhaps? :pir_laugh2:

Edited by TheOtters, 03 October 2009 - 11:58 PM.

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#12 Bricknave

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Posted 04 October 2009 - 05:09 PM

It looks better than it did before now!  Fantastic work!
The only thing about this vignette I dislike now is the black statue.  It is too tall for me.  I agree with The Alchemyst, the statue should have a different stone color.  I would like the statue if it was shorter and a different stone color, or if it was removed.
Otherwise, the actual peace treaty signing scene and officer guarding the top of the fort scene is quite splendid.  :pir-classic:
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#13 Vladimir Leonov

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Posted 04 October 2009 - 10:07 PM

Thanks for all the input! I was looking forward to the idea of the statue, but it is too big for the scene. It would be more effective in grey and in a larger MOC where the scale would allow for larger decor like that. I think I might actually replace it with a large redcoat flag hanging on the wall like a tapestry. I should have my hands on a much better camera soon, so I can get some decent looking photos up!

#14 Vladimir Leonov

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Posted 07 October 2009 - 09:52 PM

Okay, so I've made some changes, removed the statue and replaced it with a flag tapestry on the wall. I've also added the Admiral holding a feather pen while the Captain banters with an Imperial officer and one of the Captain's sailors chats with the soldier on the battlements.

#15 Captain Blackmoor

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Posted 07 October 2009 - 10:34 PM

Ah this is much better! Great improvements with an eye on the details, the feather in the hand for example.
You only could do with a better camera though so we get an even better view. :pir-wink:
Some tiles on the top of the wall would be nice. It adds more realism and just looks better then studs.

Edited by Captain Blackmoor, 07 October 2009 - 10:35 PM.

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#16 Lorentzen

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Posted 11 October 2009 - 08:10 PM

I must say, I like this updated version much better. It's so great to see how a buch of people's criticism can help somebedy improve a MOC like that.

I really hope you get the chance to take some better pictures before the end of the competition.
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#17 The Alchemyst

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Posted 12 October 2009 - 04:23 AM

Pictures still need some better quality, but the MOC has vastly improved.

The top has a nice scene of the pirate and soldier chatting like old friends. I'd just add some tiles on the studs there.

The green window seems out of place. and while I initially liked the large flag there, it seems large and obtrusive. Some of architecture from before looked better I feel.

I'm loving the rest though, the desk especially. I really like how you got the shape spot on, and added the small details of the ink and quill. It really helps with the overall look. It'd make more sense if he was sitting down, signing, but then he'd be too far from the desk. Maybe raise it up a stud, and add some visible legs?

The floor is brilliant, and I like how the two factions are raising hands to shake, but aren't shaking so they don't block the signer.

Overall a really nice and full small entry. It's improved tons since the first one.

I'd love to see where this goes, I'll be watching.

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#18 martinsuper

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Posted 14 October 2009 - 08:52 PM

I really enjoy the update a lot more! It reminds me of classic portraits of surrenders and peace treaties.

#19 Zorro

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Posted 14 October 2009 - 09:13 PM

Great update yes, and I also like the concept: the signing of a peace treaty, which hasn't been done yet as far as I've checked up on the entries.
Have fun and I wish you much luck with the contest!
Btw, I blogged it on Classic-Pirates.com today.

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