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Needs more salt!


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11 replies to this topic  – Started by I Scream Clone , Nov 02 2008 02:33 AM

#1 I Scream Clone

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Posted 02 November 2008 - 02:33 AM

Posted Image Vig. 31d

Needs more salt!

Updated


I hope you enjoy my entry into the Medium division for Pillage the Village. It depicts the final fate of King Kahuka; the Cannibal tribe leader.
The pirates have launched a raid through a secret cave wharf known only to them. They were quick to rout the King's forces, setting about turning the tables on the cannibal by serving him up for dinner!

Overall shot.
This picture depicts the chasm between the towering cliff faces, hidden cave and general pirate pillaging.
Posted Image

Needs more salt Captain!
Taking a chance to pay back all the other pirates that meet King Kahuka and his cannibals dinner plates, the pirates toss Kahuka into the boiling broth!
Now with salt shaker!
Posted Image

Treacherous journey

Making the trip over the chasm is fraught with danger, the old vine ropes and wooden planks holding the bridge up could snap at anytime! The journey seems much easier if you focus on the drumsticks!
Posted Image

Loading up the booty

Now that the battle is over, the pirates start to lower their treasure into the secret cave to load onto the waiting nearby boat. The bats seem oblivious to all the action.
Posted Image

An unfortunate past explorer
Here is last weeks dinner!
Posted Image

Any comments and criticisms are welcome as well as which picture to select for judging.
Now updated with all the little fixes hopefully.

Cheers
ISC

Edited by SlyOwl, 14 November 2009 - 11:35 PM.

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#2 Legoking

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Posted 02 November 2008 - 02:38 AM

Opinion
I like you’re heading a lot, "Needs More Salt." Now I know why it is that is because the pirates are cooking an islander. I like that you made your MOC with looks of rocks and ledges giving it a better appearance. The palm trees are nicely made and I see you have added a rainbow parrot on top of the tree. I like how you made the bridge by snapping Lego pieces on string. I also like the bats that you added hanging on the rocks.

Possible Improvements

1) I would put some brown and green tiles on the top of your MOC where the pirates are standing.

2) In the pit where there is a dead explorer, you could add some other skeleton parts on the plants and in the water.

3) You could have another Islander fighting a pirate to try to free his king. Here, you could add some blood.

Non-Brick Related

1) Spelling error: "Heres a soldier who plunged to his death rather than be cooked up by King Kahuka." It should be: "Here is a soldier that plunged to his death, rather than being cooked by King Kahuka."

Overall- You have done a terrific job on your MOC, making it hard to find improvements. I think you did a great job, just some very minor things to fix. I wish you the best of luck!

LegoKing

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My small PTV contest entry is coming soon!

Edited by LegoKing, 02 November 2008 - 02:11 PM.

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#3 Pickerel

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Posted 02 November 2008 - 03:08 AM

View PostLegoKing, on Nov 1 2008, 09:38 PM, said:

I like what I see so far. I will leave feedback in a little bit.
Is there any point to this? Why didn't you just wait a little bit then post. You don't need call reserves on commenting!  :imperialguard_commander1:
Please think before posting unless in a life-threatening situation!

Anywho, nice MOC ISC, very funny (and gruesome) too!
Pros:
~I love your bridge design! Do you mind if I take it?  :pir-vader:
~You've really gotten those rocks down, haven't you!  :pir_laugh2:
~Great idea! The cannibal gets cannibalized! :kahuka:
~You've got a pretty clever Snot cave. I think it needs to be tiled in the open-stud areas, though.
~Nice useage of the wagon wheel for the fire!
~Kudos for having little details like the dead soldier and the drunken pirate
~It's cruel, and that's what matters most, RIGHT?  :pir-skull: (Speaking of cruelty, happy belated Halloween! I forgot to say those words yesterday and just needed to say 'em!)

Cons:
~Any reason how come you didn't use one of the palm tree bases? The cylinders look strange.
~What are those brown plates supposed to be next to the soldier carrying the box in the cave supposed to be?
~Kahuka needs salt. A meal with such high expectations is ruined by the lack of salt. Is that water saltwater? :pir-look:
~The cave and ground could really look great with some tiling! I don't think the bumpiness goes with the detailed (and pretty) rocks!
~That frog is in a dangerous position. I hope it's not going to commit suicide! :pir-oh3: :pir_bawling:
~I can't come up with any worthwhile criticisms. Toughen up, Pickerel!  :pir-cry_sad:

Overall a great MOC! Hope you get prizes!

Pickerel
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#4 Zorro

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Posted 02 November 2008 - 03:30 AM

My opinion:
This is fantastic, I Scream Clone! I do not only admire the chosen topic, but also how you build those cliffs and that bridge. Your chosen faces and items are right as well, so a big  :thumbup: from me! I too can barely come up with possible improvements.

Possible improvements:
1) It looks like your pirates are bringing their treasure to the top, instead of unloading it to a boat. Maybe you could face the pirate standing near the little docks towards the water to make it fit better into the story. Off course this is only a minor thing.

2) I would have loaded the middle cave with bones, skeletons and other remainings to represent an early "garbage dump place" from the Islanders.

3) Minor things like adding plumes to their hats and hanging a rope where the pirates have to climb up/down: that could add even more realism to this already awesome MOC.

Non-brick related advise:
1) Some spelling errors/typos: eg. "none only to them" should be "known only to them".


I cannot stress enough this is a superb entry! Great work.

#5 Erdbeereis

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Posted 02 November 2008 - 03:40 AM

Good entry ISC!
The rope bridge is beautiful and adds a good adventure feel to the entry, plus the rocks look very nice.
I also like the idea of boiling King Kahuka! In fact, I'm doing something similar in my large entry.... :pir-devil:

A few improvements you could make are:

1) I think putting bley tiles in the cave would give it a much smoother look, which is always a big plus in my opinion.

2) The palm tree on the right looks a bit awkward since all of the leaves are in one direction. The rules say a bit of overlap is allowed, so I would spread them out evenly.

3) One idea which I think would be very creative and match the entry's title well, would be to put a white cone in the pirate's hand next to the cauldron, to represent salt.

4) Since your first picture is the one that will be judged, I would take one that shows the whole thing. The view you have right now doesn't show the top of entry very well. Just raising the camera a hair from the first picture will easily fix that.


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Overall though, your entry is very good! I love the humor and the design is great as well.
Nice job!

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#6 JimBee

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Posted 02 November 2008 - 04:33 AM

Very nice entry, ISC, reminds me of Pirates of the Carribean: Dead Man's Chest.  :pir_laugh2:

What I like:

The feel of peril is nicely demonstrated with those beautifully done cliffs, Master of SNOT! Good idea in adding extra foliage on the cliff faces to make them look mossy. I also like the cave, bridge, and dock. Of course, the concept itself is pretty cruel, yet comical. The addition of some vegetables in the pot with the cannibal is really funny, like an old-school cartoon.

What could be improved:
There's a couple of things that I would improve for this MOC, however. First, the pirate with the treasure on top of the cliff holding the barrel looks a little weird. It looks like he's drinking a barrel of rum, falling asleep as he does so, but I imagine he's heaving the treasure. To make this look less confusing, I would suggest you make him stand up rather than lay down. Also, I would have the fallen Imperial soldier positioned in a way so that it looks like he actually fell, and not just sat down in the water. Perhaps have him sprawled out, with his face in the water.

Overall, though, this was a very creative piece, ISC, so I wish you good luck!

Edited by JimButcher, 08 November 2008 - 05:17 AM.

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#7 Fredster wozere

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Posted 02 November 2008 - 03:01 PM

Very good MOC! I'll just pick a few of the brilliant features in this entry...

1) The cliff face; very good SNOTage here, really creating the feeling of a treacherous landscape. Also, things like the bats sleeping are nice features.
2)The humour; the idea of getting revenge on cannibals by eating them themselves is simply brilliant
3)The bridge; I love it! And by describing it you really make me feel sorry for everyone who has to cross it...although you say old vines, but I can't see any anywhere. How about changing that bit to rope?

    Another teeny nitpick I have is the posing of the past explorer; his hands is sort of raised, and all his clothing is intact; wouldn't is have been torn off by the time his body had decayed?
   10/10!

#8 Guss

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Posted 02 November 2008 - 05:57 PM

very nice entry ISC^^

I love how they're cooking King Kahuka! the drunken pirate really is a nice addition ! I love how he is drinking the entire barrel !

I do'nt really see how you can improve it, that's already excellent!

great job  !  I wish you the best for the contest!  :thumbup:

Edited by Guss, 02 November 2008 - 05:58 PM.

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#9 I Scream Clone

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Posted 03 November 2008 - 01:00 AM

View PostLegoKing, on Nov 2 2008, 01:38 PM, said:

Possible Improvements

1) I would put some brown and green tiles on the top of your MOC where the pirates are standing.

2) In the pit where there is a dead explorer, you could add some other skeleton parts on the plants and in the water.

3) You could have another Islander fighting a pirate to try to free his king. Here, you could add some blood.

Non-Brick Related

1) Spelling error: "Heres a soldier who plunged to his death rather than be cooked up by King Kahuka." It should be: "Here is a soldier that plunged to his death, rather than being cooked by King Kahuka."
Thanks, I will have a better look at the skeleton, not sure about tiles on top, might make it look like planks of wood.

View PostPickerel, on Nov 2 2008, 02:08 PM, said:

Cons:
~Any reason how come you didn't use one of the palm tree bases? The cylinders look strange.
~What are those brown plates supposed to be next to the soldier carrying the box in the cave supposed to be?
~Kahuka needs salt. A meal with such high expectations is ruined by the lack of salt. Is that water saltwater? :pir-look:
~The cave and ground could really look great with some tiling! I don't think the bumpiness goes with the detailed (and pretty) rocks!

Overall a great MOC! Hope you get prizes!

Pickerel
Great ideas for improvement. I will def add a salt shaker! the cave has dirt on the ground hence the brown plates.


View Postzorro3999, on Nov 2 2008, 02:30 PM, said:

My opinion:
This is fantastic, I Scream Clone! I do not only admire the chosen topic, but also how you build those cliffs and that bridge. Your chosen faces and items are right as well, so a big  :thumbup: from me! I too can barely come up with possible improvements.

Possible improvements:
1) It looks like your pirates are bringing their treasure to the top, instead of unloading it to a boat. Maybe you could face the pirate standing near the little docks towards the water to make it fit better into the story. Off course this is only a minor thing.

2) I would have loaded the middle cave with bones, skeletons and other remainings to represent an early "garbage dump place" from the Islanders.

3) Minor things like adding plumes to their hats and hanging a rope where the pirates have to climb up/down: that could add even more realism to this already awesome MOC.

Non-brick related advise:
1) Some spelling errors/typos: eg. "none only to them" should be "known only to them".


I cannot stress enough this is a superb entry! Great work.
Cool, thanks for the tips Zorro! I will fix the spelling and reposition a few things too.

View PostErdbeereis1, on Nov 2 2008, 02:40 PM, said:

Good entry ISC!
The rope bridge is beautiful and adds a good adventure feel to the entry, plus the rocks look very nice.
I also like the idea of boiling King Kahuka! In fact, I'm doing something similar in my large entry.... :pir-devil:

A few improvements you could make are:

1) I think putting bley tiles in the cave would give it a much smoother look, which is always a big plus in my opinion.

2) The palm tree on the right looks a bit awkward since all of the leaves are in one direction. The rules say a bit of overlap is allowed, so I would spread them out evenly.

3) One idea which I think would be very creative and match the entry's title well, would be to put a white cone in the pirate's hand next to the cauldron, to represent salt.

4) Since your first picture is the one that will be judged, I would take one that shows the whole thing. The view you have right now doesn't show the top of entry very well. Just raising the camera a hair from the first picture will easily fix that.


==========================================================

Overall though, your entry is very good! I love the humor and the design is great as well.
Nice job!
I wasn't sure about the placement of palm leaves in the rules, I will fix this up and tiles away!!!!! GO SNOT!

View PostJimButcher, on Nov 2 2008, 03:33 PM, said:

What could be improved:
There's a couple of things that i would improve for this MOC, however. First, the pirate with the treasure on top of the cliff holding the barrel looks a little weird. It looks like he's drinking a barrel of rum, falling asleep as he does so, but I imagine he's heaving the treasure. To make this look less confusing, I would suggest you make him stand up rather than lay down. Also, I would have the fallen Imperial soldier positioned in a way so that it looks like he actually fell, and not just sat down in the water. Perhaps have him sprawled out, with his face in the water.

Overall, though, this was a very creative piece, ISC, so I wish you good luck!
He is drink the rum straight from the barrel, hence why he is lying down. I envisage pirates to be slackers when it comes to work.
Im working on the skeletons too.
Cheers

Thanks for all the nice comments!
Cheers
ISC

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#10 I Scream Clone

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Posted 03 November 2008 - 03:31 AM

Thanks for all the comments guys. I have updated the pics now and feel a lot happier with the final MOC.
Thank you again.
Cheers
ISC

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#11 Erdbeereis

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Posted 03 November 2008 - 03:38 AM

That's much better!
Great improvements on an already fantastic MOC. :thumbup:

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#12 RoVer

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Posted 08 November 2008 - 04:23 AM

fantastic entry... the bridge!!! love it!!!!

i can´t think in nothing to improve it... hope to see a large entry like this




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