LegoKing, on Nov 2 2008, 01:38 PM, said:
Possible Improvements
1) I would put some brown and green tiles on the top of your MOC where the pirates are standing.
2) In the pit where there is a dead explorer, you could add some other skeleton parts on the plants and in the water.
3) You could have another Islander fighting a pirate to try to free his king. Here, you could add some blood.
Non-Brick Related
1) Spelling error: "Heres a soldier who plunged to his death rather than be cooked up by King Kahuka." It should be: "Here is a soldier that plunged to his death, rather than being cooked by King Kahuka."
Thanks, I will have a better look at the skeleton, not sure about tiles on top, might make it look like planks of wood.
Pickerel, on Nov 2 2008, 02:08 PM, said:
Cons:
~Any reason how come you didn't use one of the palm tree bases? The cylinders look strange.
~What are those brown plates supposed to be next to the soldier carrying the box in the cave supposed to be?
~Kahuka needs salt. A meal with such high expectations is ruined by the lack of salt. Is that water saltwater?
~The cave and ground could really look great with some tiling! I don't think the bumpiness goes with the detailed (and pretty) rocks!
Overall a great MOC! Hope you get prizes!
Pickerel
Great ideas for improvement. I will def add a salt shaker! the cave has dirt on the ground hence the brown plates.
zorro3999, on Nov 2 2008, 02:30 PM, said:
My opinion:
This is fantastic, I Scream Clone! I do not only admire the chosen topic, but also how you build those cliffs and that bridge. Your chosen faces and items are right as well, so a big
from me! I too can barely come up with possible improvements.
Possible improvements:
1) It looks like your pirates are bringing their treasure to the top, instead of unloading it to a boat. Maybe you could face the pirate standing near the little docks towards the water to make it fit better into the story. Off course this is only a minor thing.
2) I would have loaded the middle cave with bones, skeletons and other remainings to represent an early "garbage dump place" from the Islanders.
3) Minor things like adding plumes to their hats and hanging a rope where the pirates have to climb up/down: that could add even more realism to this already awesome MOC.
Non-brick related advise:
1) Some spelling errors/typos: eg. "none only to them" should be "known only to them".
I cannot stress enough this is a superb entry! Great work.
Cool, thanks for the tips Zorro! I will fix the spelling and reposition a few things too.
Erdbeereis1, on Nov 2 2008, 02:40 PM, said:
Good entry ISC!
The rope bridge is beautiful and adds a good adventure feel to the entry, plus the rocks look very nice.
I also like the idea of boiling King Kahuka! In fact, I'm doing something similar in my large entry....
A few improvements you could make are:
1) I think putting bley tiles in the cave would give it a much smoother look, which is always a big plus in my opinion.
2) The palm tree on the right looks a bit awkward since all of the leaves are in one direction. The rules say a bit of overlap is allowed, so I would spread them out evenly.
3) One idea which I think would be very creative and match the entry's title well, would be to put a white cone in the pirate's hand next to the cauldron, to represent salt.
4) Since your first picture is the one that will be judged, I would take one that shows the whole thing. The view you have right now doesn't show the top of entry very well. Just raising the camera a hair from the first picture will easily fix that.
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Overall though, your entry is very good! I love the humor and the design is great as well.
Nice job!
I wasn't sure about the placement of palm leaves in the rules, I will fix this up and tiles away!!!!! GO SNOT!
JimButcher, on Nov 2 2008, 03:33 PM, said:
What could be improved:
There's a couple of things that i would improve for this MOC, however. First, the pirate with the treasure on top of the cliff holding the barrel looks a little weird. It looks like he's drinking a barrel of rum, falling asleep as he does so, but I imagine he's heaving the treasure. To make this look less confusing, I would suggest you make him stand up rather than lay down. Also, I would have the fallen Imperial soldier positioned in a way so that it looks like he actually fell, and not just sat down in the water. Perhaps have him sprawled out, with his face in the water.
Overall, though, this was a very creative piece, ISC, so I wish you good luck!
He is drink the rum straight from the barrel, hence why he is lying down. I envisage pirates to be slackers when it comes to work.
Im working on the skeletons too.
Cheers
Thanks for all the nice comments!
Cheers
ISC
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(Speaking of cruelty, happy belated Halloween! I forgot to say those words yesterday and just needed to say 'em!)
