Posted 01 November 2008 - 06:51 PM
Nice one Matn, really nice!
Perhaps a beaten/dead (thus heavily bleeding) guard would be a nice touch?
Posted 01 November 2008 - 07:11 PM
At first I was going to add a bleeding/dead guard on the floor, but I wanted to keep it very simple and 'catching' ... I don't know if I would add it, it would distract from the conflict between the pirate and the governor.
Posted 01 November 2008 - 07:11 PM
What I like:
Very cruel, if the MOC isn't cruel, than the story definitely is. Your writing really got me into the MOC, and the MOC itself is good. The little details, such as the quill and ink bottle and wooden planks (the way you arranged the plates makes the floor look realistic), make this entry a really cool one. The head choice for both figs was great too- the pirate's is cruel, while the governor's is sad and sober. The way you've arranged the brown tiles on both the desk and floor (not technically 'SNOT') is done beautifully. The desk itself is magnificent.
What could be improved:
The only part that I don't like is a minor nitpick, but the governor's torso choice wasn't the best, in my opinion. I would choose something a little more suitable, perhaps check in the Great Pirate Torso Decal Library?
Overall, though, I really like this entry, and I think you have a good chance in placing. Nonetheless, I wish you good luck!
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Posted 01 November 2008 - 08:01 PM
Looks very good Matn, I love the little story you have added as well as the detailed governors desk .
1) I would have taken a picture from a different angle to use as your primary one, it is this one that will be judged so... Perhaps one like your fourth one but from a larger distance.
2) Mr. Tiber has a good point: adding a beaten/tortured guard will add the impression that the pirates have already pillaged the village and are in full control of the town.
3) A cape for the governor? Other color for the floortiles? Plumes for the governors helmet and the pirates' hat? Did you experiment with these things?
Posted 01 November 2008 - 08:01 PM
"in the navy you must always choose the lesser of two weevles"
Posted 01 November 2008 - 09:14 PM
Great entry Matn! It has a great smooth looks and I love all of the details of the table, especially the quill and ink bottle.
The story behind the entry also adds excitement to it.
A few improvements you could make are:
1) Like Mr. Tiber said, I think that adding a dead guard with some blood on the floor would add a lot to your entry, and provide good contrast to the all-brown floor. Plus, it would fill up that empty space.
2) The floor seems to blend in to the desk too much. Perhaps you could add some black or dark brown pieces on the desk for detail, which would also provide some more contrast.
3) I'm not sure that I love the trans-green cone as the ink bottle. I feel it would look much better if you were to use black.
Even without changing any of these things, you entry is fantastic. It has a smooth look to it, a good story and nice details which give it a great chance for a prize!
Posted 02 November 2008 - 10:18 AM
As for the torso of the governor, I'll keep it like that. The minifigure is a character on its own.
Like I said, a dead guard on the floor would be nice, it was also a first idea of mine, but it would distract too much from the actual conflict between the pirate and the governor. I really like it this way. A cape would indeed be nice, I put it in consideration. As for the plumes, I don't own any of them...
And yes, there isn't much contrast between the floor and the desk. I don't have other old brown tiles than the 1x4s... And the trans-green bottle is to put a little bit more contrast in the whole vignette. It would be to dark if it wouldn't be like that, I think.
Again, thanks for the nice comments. I think I will keep the vignette like this and it will be my final entry.
Posted 02 November 2008 - 02:03 PM
A very good entry; in response to what someone else said, I actually think it's a good choice of torso for the governor. And you've also conveyed the feeling of cruelty in a different way, which makes this MOC very unique to other entries which feature blood and gore. I will echo what others have said about the desk and floor colour choice, and that they blend into each other, so if you're lacking in other coloured tiles, then a dying guard would add to it.
5/5! Very good entry!
Posted 02 November 2008 - 02:26 PM
Great job Matn! I really like the idea of that once the pirates killed every entire living thing in the village; there is still one thing left to do, kill the governor. I like how you made the desk, and how you put a pen, gold and mail on it. The thing that makes you MOC look really good is that everything is smooth and has tiles.
1) I think you could change the governor's face to a more scared expression.
2) Give the governor an epaulette.
Overall- Your idea of killing the governor last is a great idea. I like that you have made everything smooth so it makes the appearance look much better. Some very minor things left to fix, but other than that, great job! I wish you the best of luck!
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Posted 02 November 2008 - 04:40 PM
I think the expression of the governor has to be sad, but serious. He knew what was comming, he was prepared to die. He has been sitting in his office the whole day feeling sad about his town, and feeling sad because he didn't fight with the men to defend the town. He knew he was going to die like this, so no scared 'I didn't see this comming'-face.
Again, thanks, it's really nice as a builder to read such comments.
Posted 10 November 2008 - 01:46 PM
1)Right! Lets begin with the first, I absolutely adore your table and chair! They are quite creative one must say, they help to bring back the mood and the wonderful setting of the past. The use of the brown plates was excellent too.
2)Pish-posh! On to the second one, the ink bottle is very interesting! A tip would be to change the transparent green to dark blue. As I dont think Ink in the past was green. The feather was a wonderful touch too.
3)Oh goody! On to the third one, can you make your govenor's minifig more distinguished. As in maybe add a cape and change the head to make him look a bit more scared.
That is all sir Matn! Good luck for your entry
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Posted 20 November 2008 - 10:38 AM
Some look at things that are, and ask why. I dream of things that never were and ask why not? (George Bernard Shaw)
Posted 21 November 2008 - 11:29 AM
I love story, and the setup is great.
The desk looks nice and detailed. It's tiled and everything. The gold coins is a nice touch.
The minifiges are great. Custommade, and the heads a very appropriate. The governor sure looks unpleased and the pirate looks evil.
Sorry.. there's nothing here that can be improved. It's an absolutely fabolous entry!
Good luck with the contest - but I'm not sure you need it
Posted 21 November 2008 - 05:37 PM
I won't make new pictures because I already have broke this entry down. I need the pieces for my Large entry, this weekend I will be thinking of a medium entry. Maybe with some Islanders in it.
That idea of a wall sounds really nice, a shame I didn't use it earlier. With pictures on it and a map of something. Oh, well.
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