29 replies to this topic

[JimButcher]

Vig. 26b
Hello, fellow Pirates fans, and welcome to my Pillage the Village medium entry! In this scene, I wanted to really represent the contest theme, so I decided to make a crew of pirates attack the central square of a village.
EDIT: Revised Edition, all comments before post with new pics on page 2 refer to original version.

Okay, everyone, I've done my updated version! This is basically the same concept, but I added a lot of new items and rearranged some.
So to start off, here's an overview:

Pillaging and plundering ahoy! Check out the market stands, bench and sign that I think make it look more like a real Market Square. Also, plenty of gore to go around. So, enjoy!


The shop owner of the stand with the canopy has been stabbed and ruthlessly shoved into his stand. He's puking out blood, now... a poor villager has been set on fire by a previous bomb thrown by the pirate with the blue shirt.


Captain Furious himself stabs an innocent child, spraying blood everywhere. Also note the crushed bench and the stabbed villager.


Here you see a few surviving villagers fleeing the pirates. The maiden notices a glint of red as she sprints by, and glance behind her. She wished she hadn't, because what she saw wasn't pretty: a pirate had skinned and gutted the villager selling fruit, and replaced the fruit with blood, guts, and the corpse.


The two villagers running, but more importantly, the bomb thrown by the pirate in blue bashing through the sign. If I had made this MOC a second later than the time frame that I did, we would see the sign and the area around it exploding. By the way, the villager on fire has been caught in a previous explosion.


Front view of the sign.

More pictures here and here.

Thanks for looking, feel free to leave any suggestions!

Edited by SlyOwl, 05 November 2009 - 08:17 PM.

[Bob]

Hah, Captain Furious...That is about as cruel as you can get. Crazy pirates, attacking random people. Looks nice and nasty which is perfect for this contest!

[NerdFighter]

If I were to change anything, I would add more structures such as market stalls just to add more dimension.  This MOC just seems a little too flat.  Other than that, Nice job!  The blood looks good and it clearly displays cruelty.

[Erdbeereis]

Nice entry JimButcher! It is certainly plenty grusome. I really like the blood coming out of the child's back (that sounds so wrong...).

Here are a few improvements you could make

1) The area that has tiles on it looks very nice and I think that making the whole square like that would greatly improve the look of it.

2) I think removing the suspended bomb wouldn't be a bad idea, as it's not too easy to tell what it is and stands out a bit too much on top of that large clear piece.

3) It looks slightly empty in the middle of the MOC. One thing that would add a lot of detail and excitement to the MOC, would be to make a small market stand full of produce and after the attack, blood and guts.

You have done a good job with your entry JimButcher and I wish you good luck in the contest!

[Legoking]

Opinion
Nice MOC JimButcher! Great use of blood and pillaging. I like your whole idea of pirates attacking a village square and killing every villager in their sight. Your story fits your pictures very well. I like the villager towards the back that is on fire. Nice touch! I like how you put a pirate pushing a villager into their own fruit crates and spilling their guts everywhere. I like how you have villagers stabbed on the ground with blood everywhere. Is that a bomb in the air or a cannon ball? I see you have used a lot of Jedi torsos in your MOC. Did you use Jedi torsos because your were short on other torsos or you just wanted to?

Possible Improvements

1) On the left side of your MOC, there are tiles on the ground. I would take them off or cover the base plate entirely with them.

2) I have seen too much clear pieces and I would take the bomb and clear piece away from your MOC.

3) In the center of your MOC, there is just empty space. You could add a barrel or crate that is on fire.

Overall- This is a great MOC. There are a few minor improvements, but other than that, it is great! I wish you the best of luck!

LegoKing

[Ye Olde Pirate]

Good. Nice and brutal.  Just how I like it.  However I think you should add a bit more detail, I mean it is a town square, so maybe you could add some burning market stalls, that sort of thing.

[JimButcher]

Thanks for all of the feedback, so far, guys!

Erdbeereis1, on Oct 13 2008, 07:20 PM, said:

Nice entry JimButcher! It is certainly plenty grusome. I really like the blood coming out of the child's back (that sounds so wrong...).

Here are a few improvements you could make

1) The area that has tiles on it looks very nice and I think that making the whole square like that would greatly improve the look of it.

2) I think removing the suspended bomb wouldn't be a bad idea, as it's not too easy to tell what it is and stands out a bit too much on top of that large clear piece.

3) It looks slightly empty in the middle of the MOC. One thing that would add a lot of detail and excitement to the MOC, would be to make a small market stand full of produce and after the attack, blood and guts.

You have done a good job with your entry JimButcher and I wish you good luck in the contest!

Thanks, Erdbeereis!
1) Hm, it was meant to be just a path to the little fruit stand, and I don't have enough tiles to cover the whole thing. Good suggestion, though!
2) Hm, you're right, but I'm not sure how else to incorporate it...
3) Yes, I suppose so, but I also need room for the pirates. Perhaps I could add a little something...

LegoKing, on Oct 13 2008, 08:28 PM, said:

Opinion

Possible Improvements

1) On the left side of your MOC, there are tiles on the ground. I would take them off or cover the base plate entirely with them.

2) I have seen too much clear pieces and I would take the bomb and clear piece away from your MOC.

3) In the center of your MOC, there is just empty space. You could add a barrel or crate that is on fire.

Overall- This is a great MOC. There are a few minor improvements, but other than that, it is great! I wish you the best of luck!

LegoKing

1) See 1 above.
2) I'm not sure what you mean- that is the only clear piece I have in this MOC.
3) See 3 above.
Thanks for your interest and support, though!

Ye Olde Pirate, on Oct 13 2008, 09:08 PM, said:

Good. Nice and brutal.  Just how I like it.  However I think you should add a bit more detail, I mean it is a town square, so maybe you could add some burning market stalls, that sort of thing.

Hm, yes, see 3 above. Thank you!

[Zorro]

My opinion:

At this point, I think it is an average to good MOC. There are most definatly some improvements to be made, but you have a very good base to start with.

Possible improvements:

1) Some of the red bricks you used to represent blood don't look that good, I am pointing especcialy to the 2 pieces on the right of the dead (stabbed) guy.

2) I'd let the brown-tricorne pirate hold that cutlass in his hand, and I would give the pierced guy some hair or a hat. The bloodworks on this minifig are cool BTW.

3) I also agree on some of the points made by my fellow members, like the fact the tiles look a bit weird as they are now, and the bomb is ok, it's just the long transparant that looks a bit out of his place.
That piece has been used in more MOCs for this contest, but I just don't seem to like it. JMHO though.

4) Maybe you could add rats/a crow/a dog that drinks blood or eats one of the dead guys. That would be a nice addition I think.

5) Do you think you could find a way to let the lady stumble?

Non-brick related advise:

IF you want to, you could make your next pics a bit larger (800x600 is allowed for this contest).


The best of luck and have fun while building!

Edited by zorro3999, 14 October 2008 - 03:15 PM.

[Guss]

haha , that s a nice moc ^^ I like how there is blood and more blood ! that is what I call a Pillage!

[Cameron_Talley]

Nice start on this entry.  Lots going on here and lots of cruelty and action.  I like the use of the red spaceman arm to represent the "skinned" arm, and that's a great blood effect on the guy that's getting gored.

My suggestions:  Overall I think the scene is a little too cluttered.  I think what really bugs me is the smooth tiles.  Either make the entire base smooth, or remove those tiles.  All they really do now is to clutter up the scene.

The "flying bomb" on the clear piece doesn't seem to have a purpose, and it isn't readily apparent what it is supposed to be.  I suggest removing it altogether.  Maybe you could replace it with a streetlight or some other structure that would make the location more evident.

Which brings me to the main problem with this entry: You say it is a town square, but where is the square?  You could add some walls to suggest shops or maybe a shanty roof over the fruit stand.

Overall, it's a nice start but with some improvements, it could be much better.

[JimButcher]

zorro3999, on Oct 14 2008, 10:12 AM, said:

My opinion:

At this point, I think it is an average to good MOC. There are most definatly some improvements to be made, but you have a very good base to start with.

Possible improvements:

1) Some of the red bricks you used to represent blood don't look that good, I am pointing especcialy to the 2 pieces on the right of the dead (stabbed) guy.

2) I'd let the brown-tricorne pirate hold that cutlass in his hand, and I would give the pierced guy some hair or a hat. The bloodworks on this minifig are cool BTW.

3) I also agree on some of the points made by my fellow members, like the fact the tiles look a bit weird as they are now, and the bomb is ok, it's just the long transparant that looks a bit out of his place.
That piece has been used in more MOCs for this contest, but I just don't seem to like it. JMHO though.

4) Maybe you could add rats/a crow/a dog that drinks blood or eats one of the dead guys. That would be a nice addition I think.

5) Do you think you could find a way to let the lady stumble?

Non-brick related advise:

IF you want to, you could make your next pics a bit larger (800x600 is allowed for this contest).


The best of luck and have fun while building!

Thanks for your feedback, Zorro.
1) The "split" 1x2 trans-red tiles are supposed to be blood that he threw up. I think it works quite well, and differentiates it from the regular blood.
2) I agree that the Captain would look better holding the sword, but it always popped out, or took him out of the studs that he was standing on. The kid who was stabbed didn't have a real hairpiece because of the printed hair, but I see your point.
3) I like the tiles... just a stone pathway... but yes, the transparent piece is out of place, and I'm thinking about replacing it with the bomb blowing up an object such a a sign.
4) I was thinking about adding a rat, but decided not to, as the villagers had just been killed, and  the rats would be to scared to come even close to the pirates.
5) What do you mean? She's running away from the pirates...

As for the picture size, that's as large as it gets before it goes over the limit, so I'm going to keep it that way.

Cameron_Talley, on Oct 14 2008, 10:31 AM, said:

Nice start on this entry.  Lots going on here and lots of cruelty and action.  I like the use of the red spaceman arm to represent the "skinned" arm, and that's a great blood effect on the guy that's getting gored.

My suggestions:  Overall I think the scene is a little too cluttered.  I think what really bugs me is the smooth tiles.  Either make the entire base smooth, or remove those tiles.  All they really do now is to clutter up the scene.

The "flying bomb" on the clear piece doesn't seem to have a purpose, and it isn't readily apparent what it is supposed to be.  I suggest removing it altogether.  Maybe you could replace it with a streetlight or some other structure that would make the location more evident.

Which brings me to the main problem with this entry: You say it is a town square, but where is the square?  You could add some walls to suggest shops or maybe a shanty roof over the fruit stand.

Overall, it's a nice start but with some improvements, it could be much better.

1) Too cluttered? Hm, I have to disagree, I wanted the scene to look hectic, as pirate pillaging is. I added the tiles for detail.
2)Yes, see my comment above.
3) I said town square because of the vendors and all of the people in it. It's just part of a town square, not the whole thing. I made basically what I could fit.
Thank you for your feedback!

[Erdbeereis]

I certainly don't think it's too crowded right now.
I agree with Cameron Talley that it wouldn't be a bad idea to remove the flying bomb altogether and I like your idea of making some sort of a sign.
Keep us posted!

[Captain Zuloo]

Well it is a town square, so maybe add a fountain? I don't know if it would be a pirate time thing, but they had pumps, so just an idea.

[Cameron_Talley]

Too clarify my comment: I didn't necessarily mean that the action was too cluttered or hectic--rather than the whole piece seems to lack a sort of cohesiveness.  I think those tiles are really what makes me feel this way; I know they were added for detail, but if the whole thing isn't smooth, it just seems--I don't know, perhaps "unfinished" is the word I'm looking for.  I hope that makes my comment make a little more sense.

[Captain Zuloo]

I agree. The tiles look a little out of place. Either have them there or don't.

[Commander Red Hat]

Nice work, perhaps a building facade might add something to the square feel?

Where does the dark blu lady come from?

[JimButcher]

Thanks guys! I am working on an improved version now, by adding some more items (bench, sign, perhaps a building facade). I will also consider moving the tiles in a different pattern spread over the whole thing, or removing them. Green Hair, the dark blue lady is from the Castle sets, but with different hair.

[Zorro]

JimButcher, on Oct 15 2008, 11:45 PM, said:

Thanks guys! I am working on an improved version now, by adding some more items (bench, sign, perhaps a building facade). I will also consider moving the tiles in a different pattern spread over the whole thing, or removing them. Green Hair, the dark blue lady is from the Castle sets, but with different hair.

I thought she came out of the Chess set...the Queen I mean  
QUEEN

[Erdbeereis]

She also came in the 7093 Skeleton Tower set.
I look forward to seeing your new and improved entry JimButcher!

[JimButcher]

Okay, everyone, I've done my updated version! This is basically the same concept, but I added a lot of new items and rearranged some.
So to start off, here's an overview:

Pillaging and plundering ahoy! Check out the market stands, bench and sign that I think make it look more like a real Market Square. Also, plenty of gore to go around. So, enjoy!


The shop owner of the stand with the canopy has been stabbed and ruthlessly shoved into his stand. He's puking out blood, now... a poor villager has been set on fire by a previous bomb thrown by the pirate with the blue shirt.


Captain Furious himself stabs an innocent child, spraying blood everywhere. Also note the crushed bench and the stabbed villager.


Here you see a few surviving villagers fleeing the pirates. The maiden notices a glint of red as she sprints by, and glance behind her. She wished she hadn't, because what she saw wasn't pretty: a pirate had skinned and gutted the villager selling fruit, and replaced the fruit with blood, guts, and the corpse.


The two villagers running, but more importantly, the bomb thrown by the pirate in blue bashing through the sign. If I had made this MOC a second later than the time frame that I did, we would see the sign and the area around it exploding. By the way, the villager on fire has been caught in a previous explosion.


Front view of the sign.

More pictures here and here.

Thanks for looking, feel free to leave any suggestions!

Edited by JimButcher, 18 October 2008 - 03:41 AM.

[Captain Zuloo]

Fantastic - this is a real contender now. I like the second picture because it looks like the blue pirate is holding the bloke's head. And the man on fire is very entertaining. Good work and good luck.   

[Cameron_Talley]

Oh yes!  I like this updated version very much!  Now it seems like a coherent scene!  Your little canopy is brilliant..My only suggestion would be to use red curved slopes instead of the red technic wing pieces...but that may be a limitation of your collection...

[Erdbeereis]

Much, much better JimButcher!
The stand and bench add a lot to the scene.

Good work!

[Zorro]

The stand is an excellent upgrade of your MOC, JimButcher. You also improved "bloodflow" and the placement of most of the bricks is better as well.

Some suggestions/advise I can make:
1) Maybe the first pic could be taken from another side, so the open-ended bricks used for the top of the stand don't show as hard.
2) I think you should update your first post as well. Or at least don't forget to do it when you have finished your MOC.
3) The burning guy could be reaching for (a bucket?) of water...if YOU want him too ...and the pirate could hold the bucket just an inch before his nose (cruelty factor ON).

Edited by zorro3999, 18 October 2008 - 01:22 AM.

[JimButcher]

Thanks, guys! Yes, I think improved this a great deal, thanks for all of the help! Cameron Talley, yes you are right about both: Red slopes would look better, but the Technic wings were the best I had. I'll also update the first post to resemble my revised post.