My second MOC - WIP

[Gen. Knowledge]

Hello,

I am working on my second entry for a Castaway Contest, and can't seem to get the blue plates to look like water. Does anyone here have any suggestions. I checked Bricklink for translucent blue plates, but couldn't find any that would really work well. I would appreciate any criticisms or comments. Thanks.

Notice the blue plates look nothing like water.

Looking back I should have mixed in some different gray slops to lighten up the ocean bottom.

Just a top down overview.

BrickShelf Gallery (when ready)

I added some pictures of my updates of this MOC HERE.

Tony

Edited September 14, 2008 by Gen. Knowledge

[Captain Green Hair]

You are at a good start here.

I'd suggest taking the blue bricks off the water and put some trans clear cheeseslopes on top and arrange them to be like waves.

Trans clear 1x1 round plates also gives a nice wave / bubble effect.

Good luck!

[Captain Zuloo]

Hey,

I would probably say that your biggest problem is you have a BRICK not a plate sticking up in the middle of it. What I find works well, is if you use PLATES then have some white ones as brakers and some roof tiles as in different shades of grey for rocks with a few bricks to make it look more jagged.

Regards, Captain Zuloo

P.S. Yes I know that you partly used plates but Bah!

P.P.S. Watch my movie or I will hunt you and every last one of your men down.....

P.P.P.S. Overall though, a good MOC so far with the trees especially.

[SlyOwl]

Okay, I know this is detrimental to my chances in the contest, but here goes!

The good:

-Tan sand

-Seaweed (plant thingy and whip) - nice alternatives to standard leaf piece)

-Underwater section is great, but as you said, a little colour variation wouldn't go amiss

-Mud/silt in bottom of boat I wouldn't have thought of that

-Great skeleton placement

-The second picture (waterless) could be really easily adaptable as a dried-up desert gorge; do I sense a Wild West MOC coming up?

-Nice fire pit; trans-orange flames instead?

-Wing piece as breaker; got another of those? White would work too.

Suggestions:

(I'm not saying The Bad - what you've got is great, but these are my suggestions; I'm assuming you're going to be doing a bit of BLing/PaBing, as no AFOL who's only bought sets has that many round bricks with leaves on )

-The minifig. The head+hair combination is great, but an Islander body? I'd recommend a standard pirate one, with one arm yellow (i.e. torn-off sleeve). I'd also change one of the legs to green (preferably opposite side to the torn-off sleeve), to give a ragged trouser leg where the Islander leg is.

-Using transparent bricks (light blue/blue/clear/mix) SNOT is your best attempt at getting the water to look (relatively) realistic. I'd use lots of 1x2 bricks, to get a constant texture. Opaque blue may work - and would be cheaper+easier - but wouldn't look as good, in my opinion.

-Use white plates to create surf.

-Add a shark underwater, chasing the 3 fish (take the third off the surface)

-The sandbank (?) looks a little weird; I'd either remove it, or replace it with the top of the underwater mountain sticking up through the water. The underwater mountain can also be used to support the water, so minimizing those supports.

-Plates are fine for waves; bricks are a little too sharp without any "easing in" - putting plates around them to give a more wave-like shape, as opposed to a rather square wave

-Could you slope the beach a little more? Also moving the vegetation back a little more could be more realistic...

-The tan and rocky rises are a little too steep for my liking; maybe a few more slopes in there around the edges?

The tree may work better broken up into smaller plants and 2 or so small trees of around a third of its current height instead. Do I see grey in the branches?

-Could the shelter stand out a little more? If you've got an old sail, that might work well, but otherwise there's not too much problem here. Could you use oars/spears to give the impression of wooden supports for the roof? They don't have to be attached thoroughly, as the weight of the roof and the studs should keep them in place.

What you've got here so far is a good start; it just needs a little refining here and there.

-And if the water doesn't work out, I'd just leave it. The judges will (should) understand. Or you can do a Wild West MOC

Hope this helps

[Gen. Knowledge]

You are at a good start here.

I'd suggest taking the blue bricks off the water and put some trans clear cheeseslopes on top and arrange them to be like waves.

Trans clear 1x1 round plates also gives a nice wave / bubble effect.

Good luck!

Thanks Capt. Green Hair, I will try placing some trans 1x1 to see how it will come out. I tried that underwater next to the clams to simulate air bubbles, but it didn't come out well. What are cheesesslopes? Are they the 1x2 45 degree ones?

Hey,

I would probably say that your biggest problem is you have a BRICK not a plate sticking up in the middle of it. What I find works well, is if you use PLATES then have some white ones as brakers and some roof tiles as in different shades of grey for rocks with a few bricks to make it look more jagged.

Regards, Captain Zuloo

P.S. Yes I know that you partly used plates but Bah!

P.P.S. Watch my movie or I will hunt you and every last one of your men down.....

P.P.P.S. Overall though, a good MOC so far with the trees especially.

Thanks for the comment Capt. Zuloo. I did watch your movie, and I left you a comment. Do you have a picture of the jagged look you are talking about?

Okay, I know this is detrimental to my chances in the contest, but here goes!

The good:

-Tan sand

-Seaweed (plant thingy and whip) - nice alternatives to standard leaf piece)

-Underwater section is great, but as you said, a little colour variation wouldn't go amiss

-Mud/silt in bottom of boat I wouldn't have thought of that

-Great skeleton placement

-The second picture (waterless) could be really easily adaptable as a dried-up desert gorge; do I sense a Wild West MOC coming up?

-Nice fire pit; trans-orange flames instead?

-Wing piece as breaker; got another of those? White would work too.

Suggestions:

(I'm not saying The Bad - what you've got is great, but these are my suggestions; I'm assuming you're going to be doing a bit of BLing/PaBing, as no AFOL who's only bought sets has that many round bricks with leaves on )

-The minifig. The head+hair combination is great, but an Islander body? I'd recommend a standard pirate one, with one arm yellow (i.e. torn-off sleeve). I'd also change one of the legs to green (preferably opposite side to the torn-off sleeve), to give a ragged trouser leg where the Islander leg is.

-Using transparent bricks (light blue/blue/clear/mix) SNOT is your best attempt at getting the water to look (relatively) realistic. I'd use lots of 1x2 bricks, to get a constant texture. Opaque blue may work - and would be cheaper+easier - but wouldn't look as good, in my opinion.

-Use white plates to create surf.

-Add a shark underwater, chasing the 3 fish (take the third off the surface)

-The sandbank (?) looks a little weird; I'd either remove it, or replace it with the top of the underwater mountain sticking up through the water. The underwater mountain can also be used to support the water, so minimizing those supports.

-Plates are fine for waves; bricks are a little too sharp without any "easing in" - putting plates around them to give a more wave-like shape, as opposed to a rather square wave

-Could you slope the beach a little more? Also moving the vegetation back a little more could be more realistic...

-The tan and rocky rises are a little too steep for my liking; maybe a few more slopes in there around the edges?

The tree may work better broken up into smaller plants and 2 or so small trees of around a third of its current height instead. Do I see grey in the branches?

-Could the shelter stand out a little more? If you've got an old sail, that might work well, but otherwise there's not too much problem here. Could you use oars/spears to give the impression of wooden supports for the roof? They don't have to be attached thoroughly, as the weight of the roof and the studs should keep them in place.

What you've got here so far is a good start; it just needs a little refining here and there.

-And if the water doesn't work out, I'd just leave it. The judges will (should) understand. Or you can do a Wild West MOC

Hope this helps

Thanks SlyOwl. I don't think anything I could build (yet) would give you cause for concern in any contest. I just like to use the contest as an excuse with my wife so I could build in peace. Otherwise she just thinks I'm playing with toys. What is the wing piece you are referring to as a breaker? Is it the blue half-octagon piece? I have a lot of those, but it just didn't look right. Maybe I will try again.

I'm going to head off to try everything you and the two Captains suggested before the wife gets home. Be back in a jiffy.

Tony

[Guss]

I agree that you should have done the bottom of the ocean more "lighten"

and for the sea, maybe something like that, of course it's just a suggestion, it's the first Idea I had when I saw your actual sea and thought about a way to make it looks better, but I'm not a good moc builder ^^

Edited September 10, 2008 by Guss

[Captain Zuloo]

Thanks for the comment Capt. Zuloo. I did watch your movie, and I left you a comment. Do you have a picture of the jagged look you are talking about?

Your welcome. I would say as far as rocks, use as many different shades of grey as possible, and make them as random as possible. No two rocks are the same, and ou want to reflect that in your MOCs. http://www.brickshelf.com/gallery/hicksc/P...screenshot6.png In this picture (I didn't post because it will take to long for anyone to load the forum if I did), notice how I have used calm water, until the brakers on the rocks and shore. The jagged look didn't really come out as well as I had hoped, but if you go for random, you'll be fine. And use grey for your rocks, not tan, and don't put blur bricks in the middle of the water!

I hope that made sense.

I did watch your movie, and I left you a comment.

Ah so you did. Oh well, I'll hunt you down regardless!

Captain Zuloo

[Mister Phes]

What a mighty fine entry you shall have General Knowledge!

I like the dual level concept you've got going by displaying both above and below water simultaneously. Below the water looks very dark and foreboding!

[Captain Zuloo]

Very true Mister Phes. I think with all the assistance in this thread, It could be like a community project! Not quite, but the underwater bit is great!

[Admiral Bejaune]

Its a good start. I like it. I would make the island higher than the water. You have it level with the sand so it makes the water not look like water. The sand should slowly angle up from the water.. If you do that you will see a huge difference in the realism of your creation.

-T

[Gen. Knowledge]

I agree that you should have done the bottom of the ocean more "lighten"

and for the sea, maybe something like that, of course it's just a suggestion, it's the first Idea I had when I saw your actual sea and thought about a way to make it looks better, but I'm not a good moc builder ^^

Thanks Guss, I went back to change the ocean bottom to brighten it up alittle, and ended up almost redoing the whole MOC. I will post some new pics soon. I'm waiting on a shark per one of the earlier suggestions.

Your welcome. I would say as far as rocks, use as many different shades of grey as possible, and make them as random as possible. No two rocks are the same, and ou want to reflect that in your MOCs. http://www.brickshelf.com/gallery/hicksc/P...screenshot6.png In this picture (I didn't post because it will take to long for anyone to load the forum if I did), notice how I have used calm water, until the brakers on the rocks and shore. The jagged look didn't really come out as well as I had hoped, but if you go for random, you'll be fine. And use grey for your rocks, not tan, and don't put blur bricks in the middle of the water!

I hope that made sense.

Ah so you did. Oh well, I'll hunt you down regardless!

Captain Zuloo

Thanks for the suggestions Captain Zuloo, but what are "blur bricks"?

What a mighty fine entry you shall have General Knowledge!

I like the dual level concept you've got going by displaying both above and below water simultaneously. Below the water looks very dark and foreboding!

Thanks Mister Phes. After seeing SirNadroj's stunning entry today, mine looks so dark and bulky. His dual layer effect came out great.

Very true Mister Phes. I think with all the assistance in this thread, It could be like a community project! Not quite, but the underwater bit is great!

Thanks to all the members on this board, I have been able to make great improvements to my building skills. I was just using this contest as an excuse to build. I will have to find another contest so my wife won't complain too much. Will there be any contest on Classic-Pirates?

Its a good start. I like it. I would make the island higher than the water. You have it level with the sand so it makes the water not look like water. The sand should slowly angle up from the water.. If you do that you will see a huge difference in the realism of your creation.

-T

Thanks HMS243. I have bulked up the beach more, and broken up the waterline to make it a little more realistic.

Tony

[Guss]

ok , we're waiting for you new pics ! ^^

[Gen. Knowledge]

OK Guss,

I took these pictures just for you. I tried to incorporate everything y'all suggested. It's nowhere close to completion, but additional suggestions/comments/criticism would be appreciated.

Tony

[SlyOwl]

Woah! Great improvement! The water's fantastic now (except the roof-top tile to the left of the boat - rotate it 90 degrees ), especially the wave crashing into the boat! The beach looks so much better now, and so does the shelter. Lovely waterfall (little more white in there, perhaps?), and the plants look a lot better.

I'd actually revert the sea-floor to black/tan/grey, as it looks a bit funny in blue.

As per the contest guidelines, would it be better to have the boat sunken? After all, he has been there many years, and it would have either sunk by then, or he'd have dragged it up and begun repairs (there's an idea ~ a raft perhaps?). Then again, I like the look of the boat as it is...

The specks of light grey in the rock look a little odd, as they seem a little isolated; a few more specks in there, or remove them altogether? The top of the wall is also a bit straight - breaking it up a little would be nicer, in my opinion. Nice skeleton positioning

And that's all I can say! Man, you're going to be good some day!

Thanks to all the members on this board, I have been able to make great improvements to my building skills. I was just using this contest as an excuse to build. I will have to find another contest so my wife won't complain too much. Will there be any contest on Classic-Pirates?

Yes. In the words of Bonaparte, there's something big in the pipeline. And it's nearly out.

[Guss]

yeah !! that s a way better now, that's really good ( way better than everything I did ) I agree that some white bricks in the waterfall can make it looks better, but that's really nice anyway!

[Captain Zuloo]

Yes. In the words of Bonaparte, there's something big in the pipeline. And it's nearly out.

Great improvements. I can't say the roof tile by the boat is too special but otherwise, much better.

And as far as the competition, let me just say that you will NOT be dissapointed...