21 replies to this topic

[oDDerFisken]

Vig. 32b
So finally I've made my entry for the small PTV contest.
EDIT: I've made some improvements according to the suggestions I've got. Hope you like them. New pictures - same story

This guy has always been completely obsessed with treasure, and when the pirates came to take away his precious gold he begged and begged for his life and treasure 'caus he didn't want to leave his gold and jewels. There for the pirates dicided that this was a perfect chance to check out a new way to kill people - to kill them under the weight of their loot. So they started to fill up the whole with they newly acquired fortune.
They haven't yet finished but with every chest they fill on him he can feel his body ache under the wait of his own beloved gold.







The new folder

Any criticism will be completely ignored   no off course not. Criticism are welcome and I will propably try to improve this MOC when you guys tell me what to improve

Uhh.. and for Zorro: you'll propably suggest that I should give the pirates some of the "new" faces with some more expressions, but unfortunately I haven't got any of those   But other suggestions are welcome.
EDIT: And one more thing for you Zorro I'm gonne put some feathers in the hats when I'm moderating it later .. I might think I've read to many of you comments 'caus I got a feeling what you are gonna say to me

Edited by SlyOwl, 14 November 2009 - 11:35 PM.

[Patriot720]

Great Entry. Honestly, I see no room for improvement! You've got a great storyline and a top of the notch entry to go with it! Good luck!
pat

[Erdbeereis]

That's a really creative idea Der Fisken!
You have a large amount of gold coins and other treasure.   I love the tiny amount of the buried pirate sticking out, as it looks like slowly but surely, the pirate will be crushed!

A few improvements you could make are:

1) Your faces look a bit standard... Just joking!   Sorry, I couldn't resist!

2) I think that putting some black tiles on the exposed black studs would smooth out the entry nicely.

3) The last thing to change would be to take a new first picture, as that will be the one that is judged. The current one makes it hard to see the pirates with the treasure. Just angle the camera slightly more down than in the first picture.


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Your entry is very nice and cruel, plus it's an entertaining concept.
Great work!

[Evil Wizard]

However, it is very funny! After all, a pirate does not destroy the most severely tortured - he was killed in his favorite wealth ... It is very interesting. But the pirates in the chest, which sypyat condemned to death by a pirate, are literally on the edge of your "box". Better add on all sides brown or light brown plates, as some soils, land. And so - the idea - saves all the primitiveness of construction. Only a seemingly cube filled with jewelry - but the idea ... just a snazzy idea! And treasures look too good for us and the temptation for pirates ... Good vobschem. 9 out of 10!   Only now have to fix.

[oDDerFisken]

Erdbeereis1, on Nov 4 2008, 05:41 PM, said:

1) Your faces look a bit standard... Just joking!   Sorry, I couldn't resist!

Watch your back.. something heavy might come in your direction   

Erdbeereis1, on Nov 4 2008, 05:41 PM, said:

3) The last thing to change would be to take a new first picture, as that will be the one that is judged. The current one makes it hard to see the pirates with the treasure. Just angle the camera slightly more down than in the first picture.

I've thought of that too. You mean that it should be more like the second picture?
I'm gonna put black tiles on as suggested to see how it looks. But I think it will make it pretty difficult to balance the to pirates with the treasure afterwards. Anyways: I've got most of a month to blance it out
Uhh.. and actually I've cheated a bit   There's two treasurechests below all the glimsy gold. And the poor guy is half lieing half. So it's not gold and gems all of it. unfortunately I haven't got that much gold.

Evil Wiz: I see your point, but I'm not sure I've got plates enough for that, but I'm gonna check it out, 'caus it's a good idea.

Thanks to you all for your comments and suggestions

[Guss]

a simple but bloody effective entry ! I really really LOVE It ! the cruelty of this sentence to death is just too... too great ! man I love it !     

I wanted to make the same joke than Erdbeereis ^^ but he already did it ! so I ll just say that's perfect like it , good luck for the contest !  

[Zorro]

My opinion:
Very good and innovative MOC, a nice way to approach the cruelty "request" for PTV.

Possible improvements:
There is nothing left for me to say since this is already nearly perfect.

1) The first pic doesn't show much of the pirates themselves, maybe a picture like the second one with a slightly different angle could be better(try to let them look a bit into the lens, without making them look unnatural). But off course I can't see that from behind my computer.

2) Adding some tiles like Erdbeereis1 said would look nice I think.

3) Some small typos and/or spelling mistakes that will be forgiven anyway since you are Danish and therefore English is not your native language.


PS: Your faces are just fine   , so why would I comment on that, and I looked back in my post history log and I only said to add some feathers four times, on a total of more then thirty PTV entries...    BTW both of these things are always sooo minor...
I did comment on ALL entries so far (at least I think I did, I might have missed some though.), that might be the reason   .
Please build more MOCs like this one!

Edited by zorro3999, 04 November 2008 - 07:48 PM.

[oDDerFisken]

Guss, on Nov 4 2008, 07:39 PM, said:

a simple but bloody effective entry ! I really really LOVE It ! the cruelty of this sentence to death is just too... too great ! man I love it !  

zorro3999, on Nov 4 2008, 09:22 PM, said:

My opinion:
Very good and innovative MOC, a nice way to approach the cruelty "request" for PTV.

I'm glad you both liked it.

Guss, on Nov 4 2008, 07:39 PM, said:

I wanted to make the same joke than Erdbeereis ^^ but he already did it ! so I ll just say that's perfect like it , good luck for the contest !  

  Haven't you got anything else to do??

zorro3999, on Nov 4 2008, 09:22 PM, said:

Possible improvements:
2) Some small typos and/or spelling mistakes that will be forgiven since you are Danish and therefore English is not your native language.

I've tried to eliminate those I've found, but there will propably be more. But as you mention: I'll be forgiven   (hurray!)

zorro3999, on Nov 4 2008, 09:22 PM, said:

PS: Your faces are just fine   , so why would I comment on that, and I looked back in my post history log and I only said to add some feathers four times, on a total of more then thirty PTV entries...  BTW both of these things are always sooo minor...

I thought you've said it more times, but if you checked you propably right (omg.. you've checked all you post )

zorro3999, on Nov 4 2008, 09:22 PM, said:

I did comment on ALL entries so far (at least I think I did, I might have missed some though.), that might be the reason   .

Hm.. that might be it. I'm always looking for you comments on new entries for the contest. And somehow they are always there. I guess you going for the creative critic prize!?

[Zorro]

Well, I'm having a swing at it...pretty exhausting though, and when you're done there are another five waiting , but that only shows the succes of this contest.
And I kept a small log of what I said on which PTV entry since I kinda expected that there would be so many (thanks to Phes' prizes).
Anyway: much luck with the contest !

[JimButcher]

Haha, great entry, oDDerFisken!

What I like:
This is very cruel, and a unique way of doing it at that. The great amount of shiny objects doesn't hurt either.

What could be improved:
Perhaps the walls could be a bit more detailed? I'm sure that it would make this entry even better.

Not much to say, but good luck!

[Legoking]

Opinion
I like your idea on pirates killing villagers by burring them in their own treasure. Your MOC expresses a new way on killing people and I have not seen this idea yet. Nice use of treasure in the hole. I like how you have the pirates standing on top dumping more treasure into the hole.

Possible Improvements

1) Your faces look to standard. Change the faces up and give the villager that is being buried in treasure a screaming face.

2) You could have the pirate on the right holding a rainbow parrot to add some color.

3) I think it would look nicer if you put some brown or black tiles on your MOC to make it look nicer.

Non-Brick Related

1) Most of your pictures are a bit blurry. I would retake the ones that look the blurriest.

Overall- I really like your idea of killing villagers by burring them in treasure. It is a great idea and you have done a very good job. Some minor improvements to fix, like minifig face expressions, tiling and more. But other than that, your MOC is great. I wish you the best of luck!

LegoKing

My PTV Entry- Medium
My Brickshelf
My small PTV contest entry is coming soon!

[oDDerFisken]

LegoKing, on Nov 9 2008, 12:51 AM, said:

Possible Improvements

1) Your faces look to standard. Change the faces up and give the villager that is being buried in treasure a screaming face.

Ohh.. come on.. haven't you read my first post??

oDDerFisken, on Nov 4 2008, 03:14 PM, said:

Uhh.. and for Zorro: you'll propably suggest that I should give the pirates some of the "new" faces with some more expressions, but unfortunately I haven't got any of those   But other suggestions are welcome.

I know I wrote "for Zorro" in the beginning, but I hoped that others would read it as well
Anyways.. Haven't got anything else, so the faces aren't gonna change.

LegoKing, on Nov 9 2008, 12:51 AM, said:

1) Most of your pictures are a bit blurry. I would retake the ones that look the blurriest.

I'm gonna make some improvements, and then I'm gonna retake all the pics.. So I hope that they will be better then.

Thanks to everyone for the comments. They are much appreciated

[oDDerFisken]

Now I've made my improvements, and I hope you like it. I've also taken some more pictures and hopefully they are not as blurry as the first ones.







The new folder

I'm aware that I'm doubleposting, but I'm afraid noone will notice my new pictures if I just made an edit on my first post. Hopefully no one has gotten any good ideas how to punish me during the PTV-contest

New critisim are welcome

Edited by oDDerFisken, 14 November 2008 - 01:04 PM.

[Guss]

the little improvement you did are really nice^^ now I think that there is no other things that you can do to improve it, but don't forget to edit your first post^^!

Good luck man!

[oDDerFisken]

Guss, on Nov 14 2008, 04:31 PM, said:

the little improvement you did are really nice^^ now I think that there is no other things that you can do to improve it, but don't forget to edit your first post^^!

Good luck man!

Thanks. I'm glad you think so.. 'cuas I'm not gonna retake those pictures

Uhh.. and thanks.. I'm gonna edit my first post right away.

[Erdbeereis]

Great improvements!

They make your entry look much better. Nice work!

[Legoking]

Nice improvements. The pictures look much nicer. Sorry about saying that you need to change you minifig face expressions. I did read it and I had to just say that. But forget that, the pictures are much clearer and look much nicer.

[Zepher]

I like it dude!

I think that you captured the irony well, it reminds me of what I tried to go in my entry!

[oDDerFisken]

LegoKing, on Nov 15 2008, 12:16 AM, said:

Nice improvements. The pictures look much nicer. Sorry about saying that you need to change you minifig face expressions. I did read it and I had to just say that. But forget that, the pictures are much clearer and look much nicer.

Hey it's okay.. I was just tired of people who wanted me to change the heads to some with more expression - mostly because I hacen't got any of those

I'm glad you think the improvements help

[Erdbeereis]

One more thing ocurred to me that might benefit your entry a bit.

Do you perhaps have one of those scared heads, such as this one: Scared head for the pirate being buried?

I think that putting one of those on him would give a better scared effect.

[pr0visorak]

Great Entry oDDerFisken! I love the way you drowned your pirate in the thing they love most! Money! There are some things I feel that need to be corrected though! The first oone is that there are some cracks between the walls of your little studio. Although they are small cracks. Cracks like these can very easily distract people. The next one is thatYour minifigs faces are too standard which makes your moc look a bit dull. I think you can add a horrified face to the poor minifig drowning in this riches. You can also make your pirates faces look as if they laughing at the teeror of the poor guy. I understand that you dont have enough lego faces to change the expression. You can always go to the minifig custmisation forum or kaminian decals and ask for a decal of those faces for your lego.By the way,Would you mind resizing your pics to a 480x640. Not because I want to make trouble for you but the black line above the picture when the picture is oversize is quite distracting. Although your MOC is good, you need a good presentation to show your effort. You could have an excellent MOC but if your presentation is bad. It will not do as well.Well that is all, may lady luck be with you

Edited by pr0visorak, 21 November 2008 - 07:31 AM.

[oDDerFisken]

Erdbeereis1, on Nov 21 2008, 02:30 AM, said:

One more thing ocurred to me that might benefit your entry a bit.

Do you perhaps have one of those scared heads, such as this one: Scared head for the pirate being buried?

I think that putting one of those on him would give a better scared effect.

You are definitely right, but unfortunatly I haven't got any of those   But it sure would look better with a scared face like that.