Delta62

Lego and Depression

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On 2/12/2017 at 9:19 PM, RetroInferno said:

Depressions ( many diffrent types ) goes from seasonal affective disorders to chronic ones that may require medication. You really should seek some processionnal help to guide you in the right direction.

I think we all go through some though times and some people react differently, be it social, financial or even existential. Just don't keep it all inside, it may very well turn agaisn't you in ways you wouldn't expect. I kept pretty much everything inside since I was 11 years old, which I partially rectified now at 24, because suffering leads to hate, then anger and fear and it literally eats you from the inside, even if you know what you think is rubbish but can't feel any other way. 

I'm not 100% back on track ( socially especially, god ), if I ever was, but I'm a bit more at peace.

 

You have your order a bit misplaced...it's fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering. :tongue: Fitting because your signature. 

On 2/27/2017 at 6:56 PM, Mesabi said:

I have found that unfortunately, Lego is not at all helpful when dealing with my depression. Lego gives me far to much time to think and thinking is often the enemy when you are feeling down. Does anyone else feel this way?

I'm quite the opposite. It's a great distraction for me when I'm feeling down or thinking about things that take me there. I go tinker in my town. I like that call it my "instant mood booster." I can't help but smile whenever I go in the room & give it a good look.

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On 2/27/2017 at 7:56 PM, Mesabi said:

I have found that unfortunately, Lego is not at all helpful when dealing with my depression. Lego gives me far to much time to think and thinking is often the enemy when you are feeling down. Does anyone else feel this way?

I agree, but for different reasons. If I am already feeling down, it reminds me that I should be doing something else--which makes it so I really don't want to go on to those other needed things, but I can't just sit there and build either.

Long story from me, I guess, but hopefully it can help:

About four years ago I was finishing my Master's thesis while working three part-time jobs to support my family, and in the middle of all the stress I became very depressed. I realize now I have always had some depressive tendencies--ever since junior high, at least--but at this period I was very low. I thought a lot about suicide: not as a crazy, sudden escape from the stress and ultimately from myself, but like a calculated move. I often thought through it rationally and how I would go about doing it, with a calmness that scared me then and still scares me now.

About that time I realized what it was, that I had depression, and just that recognition made a huge difference. I was able to tell my wife about it--something I was hesitant to do at first, because I didn't want to burden her, but ultimately realized I had to have her help--and just sharing it helped clear my head and my conscience. I actually wanted to get better, and wanting that had been one of the hardest things for me before.

That honestly was one of the worst things about the depression, and why it is so dangerous: you get down on yourself, to the point where you don't even care to get better because you think (1) it won't make a difference anyway, or (2) you don't deserve it (because you are failing in various aspects of your life, etc.) This is all lies. In my case anyway I became so low that it just led me to total lethargy--enough that I didn't even have the strength of mind to care. It's probably a good thing I didn't take any anti-depressants, because in that frame of mind I may have steeled up just enough nerve to actually follow through on my suicidal plan.

How did I get through it? I don't really know, exactly. I had to look at myself as a stumbling success-in-the-making, not a perpetual failure. I had to applaud myself for trying, rather than see myself as needing forgiveness for screwing up. I had to change the way I saw myself, which wasn't easy. I am not sure today that I am totally over it, or that I ever will be, although thankfully suicide is the distant past. I know that having others in my life who cared about me was the best thing, and them knowing along with me gave me strength.

So, as for Lego and depression: if it gives you time to clear your head, then that is healthy. But if having too much time with your own thoughts deepens your depression, then get out. Out of the house, out of your routine, out with friends, just out. If Lego leads you to positive relationships with others--which by the way, Andromeda's Gates did help somewhat with that, once I was already on the way out of my rut--then go for it. But if it is going to drive to to isolation and unhealthy solitude, then get out.

As Robert8 said, it is just a hobby. While it might help, it isn't a solution. Professional help may work for some; I think it would have made me worse. But try and find someone who has an interest in you know, someone who you can tell when you are having an off-day and who will try and understand your needs without rushing to 'fix' you or 'cheer you better'. It might take some time, so try and be able to wait and work until you feel stronger; you're never worthless.

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19 hours ago, rodiziorobs said:

I agree, but for different reasons. If I am already feeling down, it reminds me that I should be doing something else--which makes it so I really don't want to go on to those other needed things, but I can't just sit there and build either.

Long story from me, I guess, but hopefully it can help:

About four years ago I was finishing my Master's thesis while working three part-time jobs to support my family, and in the middle of all the stress I became very depressed. I realize now I have always had some depressive tendencies--ever since junior high, at least--but at this period I was very low. I thought a lot about suicide: not as a crazy, sudden escape from the stress and ultimately from myself, but like a calculated move. I often thought through it rationally and how I would go about doing it, with a calmness that scared me then and still scares me now.

About that time I realized what it was, that I had depression, and just that recognition made a huge difference. I was able to tell my wife about it--something I was hesitant to do at first, because I didn't want to burden her, but ultimately realized I had to have her help--and just sharing it helped clear my head and my conscience. I actually wanted to get better, and wanting that had been one of the hardest things for me before.

That honestly was one of the worst things about the depression, and why it is so dangerous: you get down on yourself, to the point where you don't even care to get better because you think (1) it won't make a difference anyway, or (2) you don't deserve it (because you are failing in various aspects of your life, etc.) This is all lies. In my case anyway I became so low that it just led me to total lethargy--enough that I didn't even have the strength of mind to care. It's probably a good thing I didn't take any anti-depressants, because in that frame of mind I may have steeled up just enough nerve to actually follow through on my suicidal plan.

How did I get through it? I don't really know, exactly. I had to look at myself as a stumbling success-in-the-making, not a perpetual failure. I had to applaud myself for trying, rather than see myself as needing forgiveness for screwing up. I had to change the way I saw myself, which wasn't easy. I am not sure today that I am totally over it, or that I ever will be, although thankfully suicide is the distant past. I know that having others in my life who cared about me was the best thing, and them knowing along with me gave me strength.

So, as for Lego and depression: if it gives you time to clear your head, then that is healthy. But if having too much time with your own thoughts deepens your depression, then get out. Out of the house, out of your routine, out with friends, just out. If Lego leads you to positive relationships with others--which by the way, Andromeda's Gates did help somewhat with that, once I was already on the way out of my rut--then go for it. But if it is going to drive to to isolation and unhealthy solitude, then get out.

As Robert8 said, it is just a hobby. While it might help, it isn't a solution. Professional help may work for some; I think it would have made me worse. But try and find someone who has an interest in you know, someone who you can tell when you are having an off-day and who will try and understand your needs without rushing to 'fix' you or 'cheer you better'. It might take some time, so try and be able to wait and work until you feel stronger; you're never worthless.

Man...this hits home a bit. Very different story, but somewhat in the same place(you were). I'm at the point of trying to convince myself to tell(or not tell...)the people in my life. That hardest ones are the ones I see on a regular basis, parents, brother, friends I see often. I'm hesitant to go the professional route. I know one thing, I don't want pills. I'm not suicidal by any means...but I take enough pills for other reasons...that I rely on. 

Thanks for sharing.

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To me, it helps. It's one of those things that give me joy. I'm not thinking about problems of life that much, I'm thinking about problems of designing and executing a build. And when a build is done, it usually gives my a lot of satisfaction - and it's the only accomplishment I have that gives me that feeling.

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