Hinckley Posted September 6, 2007 *snort* *snort* Aaah! What's going on? Where is everybody? Is everyone all right? I had the worst nightmares...so evil. "Streaks on the china, Never mattered before, Who cared? When you drop kicked the jacket, As you came through the door, No one glared. But sometimes things get turned around, And no one's spared. All hands look out below, There's a change in the status-quo. Gonna need all the help that we can get. According to our new arrival, Life is more than mere survival. And we just might live the good life yet." I think that's an appropriate song for my current level of fear. Scotty, may I call you gopher? My life's dream is to be the captain of the Love Boat. I don't want to die without realizing that dream. Will you please be my gopher? Scotty? Are you here? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Siegfried Posted September 6, 2007 I think that's an appropriate song for my current level of fear. Scotty, may I call you gopher? My life's dream is to be the captain of the Love Boat. I don't want to die without realizing that dream. Will you please be my gopher? Scotty? Are you here? I'm here Capt'n. Well, being called "Gopher" is better than "Scotty". >:-( What do you want me to do? I wouldn't want to stand in the way of a mans dream. :'-) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hinckley Posted September 6, 2007 Stinky, you'll have to be Vicky Stubing. I'll find other roles for everybody else later. Right now we should find that nerd virgin security guy and have him lead a search through the ship to make sure everyone's accounted for. I've got a tingle in my lower spine! That's usually a sign that evil is among us. Happens all the time, actually. What happened while I was sleeping? If my crew is in danger I want to do everything I can to protect them! So where is the nerd? He can be our canary... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Siegfried Posted September 6, 2007 He can be our canary... I would be so upset if he was hurt... OK Capt'n, I'll do as you want. Hey! Star Trek twerp? Where are you? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hinckley Posted September 6, 2007 Sheesh. If you like the nerd so much why don't you marry him? :-P That was a popular quip in the 80's. Isn't it clever? Very well. As the Captain of the ship...I will lead the search party to find out what happened with the blood the nerd discovered... ...as long as everyone will sing Gloria with me as we go... :'-( Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WesternOutlaw Posted September 6, 2007 As the pleasant dreams of returning to the safe lit cabins inside the ship are smashed like the gauges of the Engineering Room, the crew realize that they have never left the darkness of the fog. Up ahead; however, hope begins to flurish as a beacon of light can be seen illuminating the cargo hold; the fog diminishing. Unfortunately; however, one of the crew has met a most horrible fate. Realizing that one of you did not make it out of the dense fog, the Captain looks back to see the faint shadow of Stillman's body slumped against the cargo hold. Walking back toward him, you realize that he has been stuck with a fishing knife, the smell of dead fish permeating the air. Someone yells, "Oh my God, someone killed Stillman"! 8- Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hinckley Posted September 6, 2007 Stinky! Oh poor Stinky. Why Stinky? You were going to be my Vicki! This is just like "Maxwell Thorn" All right men! It's time like this a captain must show strength for his crew and maintain his composure... :'-( So, I think it would be appropriate... :'-( for each of us to say a few nice words about Stinky... :'-( :'-( and then follow the ancient tradition of burying a sai... *sing* *sing* *sing* Oh Stinky!!!!!!!!! Why!?!?!?! Stinky no!!!!!!!!! Oh the humanity!!! *sing* *sing* *sing* *fart* *sing* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WesternOutlaw Posted September 6, 2007 Vicki? :-D EDIT: Oh, I get it. Too funny! :-D :-D NOTE: refreshing your screen will update Stillman's avatar. Sorry SD! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hinckley Posted September 6, 2007 :'-( :'-( Stinky was my friend. Who would have done this to him? Was this his fishing knife? Who else would have a fishing knife? Maybe a chef. He has to prepare the fish, right? Where's Otto? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WesternOutlaw Posted September 6, 2007 Stinky's body jerks, and his hand grabs the shoulder of the Captain. He utters his last dying words... (wait for it, wait for it... Stinky says...) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hinckley Posted September 6, 2007 *POOT!* That tears it! I'm gonna need a new pair of pants... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Siegfried Posted September 6, 2007 Stinky! Oh poor Stinky. Why Stinky? You were going to be my Vicki! This is just like "Maxwell Thorn" Well, in time honoured tradition I will say the traditional words: It wasn't me! I've been with the Capt'n the whole time! Blame the security guy and his stupid Stark Wreck obsession. Run him up the mainsail! As for Stinky, I can't say that I will miss him. I never understood why he was on board in the first place. Always going on about fish, smelling of fish, but never actually catching one. *wacko* Bloody loon if you ask me. Speaking of fish, where is my food! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WesternOutlaw Posted September 6, 2007 Stinky's body jerks, and his hand grabs the shoulder of the Captain. He utters his last dying words...(wait for it, wait for it... Stinky says...) And Stinky mumbles his last dying words... (you didn't wait for it! Next one who says anything dies!) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sir Dillon Posted September 6, 2007 Stinky's body jerks, and his hand grabs the shoulder of the Captain. He utters his last dying words...(wait for it, wait for it... Stinky says...) *gasp* I may be dying, but you can never... stop the smell... never... Auuuughhh. *Stinky collapses, never to wake again* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hinckley Posted September 6, 2007 Stinky? He just spoke. Can anyone tell if he's actually dead or not? That death rattle was enough to sober me up for the time being... So where's the whiskey? Stinky was a true friend. It was always nice to have him along. Granted, we didn't need a fisherman, but I liked him. He had a nice smile and he sang me to sleep when Gopher wasn't around. So I found some money in the budget and hired Stinky. On paper, according to corporate, Stinky was the first mate...I'll miss Vicki "Stinky" Stubing. He was a true friend. Did I already say that? And is the engine fixed? That evil fog is gone, let's get to port quick and report this murder and put this horrific night behind us. Do we have a mainsail on a container ship?! I don't understand boats. :-$ And I can vouch for Gopher Scotty. He was with me the whole time. Granted I slept for 8 hours, but I'm pretty sure that was him spooning me the whole time... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Siegfried Posted September 6, 2007 *gasp* I may be dying, but you can never... stop the smell... never... Auuuughhh. We'll see about that. I'm going to toss the tosser over the side! X-D Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WesternOutlaw Posted September 6, 2007 Poor Stinky! May his smell of rotten fish intestines outlast the worst of company! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Siegfried Posted September 6, 2007 And is the engine fixed? That evil fog is gone, let's get to port quick and report this murder and put this horrific night behind us.Do we have a mainsail on a container ship?! I don't understand boats. :-$ And I can vouch for Gopher Scotty. He was with me the whole time. Granted I slept for 8 hours, but I'm pretty sure that was him spooning me the whole time... Nah, the engine will take at least another few hours. As for the mainsail, the forward nav mast will do. Murderers are bad luck on a ship. I say kill him and toss him over with his victim. >:-( Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hinckley Posted September 6, 2007 Detective Columbo! I mean Detective Peter Falk! I mean Detective Peter Falklin! Do your super spy senses pick up anything? Do you notice any clues? Have you checked out the nerd's room? He said he was covered in blood... "I know a girl whos tough but sweet Shes so fine, she cant be beat Shes got everything that I desire Sets the summer sun on fire I want candy I want candy Go to see her when the sun goes down Aint no finer girl in town Youre my girl, you walked up to order So sweet, you make my mouth water I want candy I want candy" That song is stuck in my head for some reason... Gopher Scotty, you have my permission to string someone up on the forward nav mast. Let's hold off removing Stinky's body until Columbo has gotten all the clues he can from it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Siegfried Posted September 6, 2007 Gopher Scotty, you have my permission to string someone up on the forward nav mast. Let's hold off removing Stinky's body until Columbo has gotten all the clues he can from it. Aye Aye Capt'n! *sweet* I will be hunting down the freak right now. Thank you! *sweet* Freak! Freak! Where are you? I have a hammer with your name on it! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oo7 Posted September 6, 2007 What be this? We be havin' a murderer on board, do we now? I warned ya all, I warned ya! One of us here, a fella of our own crew, is bein' a beholder o' great evil, and the fierce an' unforgiving sea be slowly reachin' out to snatch it an' bring it down to it's own watery depths of Davy Jone's locker! Avast ye scurvy swabs! His face there be decayed to the bare bone in a matter of minutes while his hands are not bein so? This is bein' truly the works o' a deep, dark evil. Aye, aye! It be that accursed evil monstrosity that has bein' razeed us; made a poor pegging lubber of me fer ever and a day! and I'll be chasin him round Good Hope, and round the Horn, and round the Norway Maelstrom, and round perdition's flames before I be givin' him up. And this be what ye have shipped fer, men! To chase that diabolical beast on both sides of land, an' over all sides of earth, till he spouts black blood like the viscous oil from our damaged engine room! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Siegfried Posted September 6, 2007 To chase that diabolical beast on both sides of land, an' over all sides of earth, till he spouts black blood like the viscous oil from our damaged engine room! I second that. Kill the freak! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hinckley Posted September 6, 2007 Mr. Mason, I'm still sober and I still have no idea who you are. Can I call you Vicki Stubing? Gopher, I really could use the whiskey before you run off on your freak hunt... *sweet* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Siegfried Posted September 6, 2007 Gopher, I really could use the whiskey before you run off on your freak hunt... *sweet* Sure Capt'n. For being so nice to me here are two full bottles. *sweet* That should keep you happy for a hour or so! :-D Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hinckley Posted September 6, 2007 Now I can drown my sorrow over the lost of Stinky... "Celebrate good times, come on! (Let's celebrate) Celebrate good times, come on! (Let's celebrate) There's a party goin' on right here A celebration to last throughout the years So bring your good times, and your laughter too We gonna celebrate your party with you Come on now Celebration Let's all celebrate and have a good time Celebration We gonna celebrate and have a good time It's time to come together It's up to you, what's your pleasure Everyone around the world Come on!" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
